6.08 Let Me Hear Your Balalaikas Ringing Out

[Logan is walking through the Yale campus, on the phone with Rory]
Rory: You really get like no notice on these things do you?
Logan: None. Its always 'grab your bags, and meet me on the tarmac in an hour, son, over and out'. Its always an ungodly hour.
Rory: 6am?
Logan: Thats my bedtime for Godsake.
Rory: So where is he dragging you this time?
Logan: A paper in Omaha. What state is that in again?
Rory: Nebraska.
Logan: Uh...corn, farm animals...football?
Rory: Oh, and they love condescention in Nebraska, too, so hit them with that as soon as you disembark.
Logan: Well, you have got to be free tonight, my dear. 'Cuz I am getting the group together for a blow out. Do not tell me your working.
Rory: I can make some time for you. (sees Emily) Oops...evasive manuever.
Logan: What?
Rory: My grandmother.
Logan: She coming at you with a knife or something?
Rory: Its one thing to be forced to live in the big house, but now the big house is feeling Tom Thumb tiny. My grandmother is everywhere.
Logan: The older generation. They have their own methods of ubiquity.
Rory: Im positive that there are at least five of her wandering around the property like shes a Cylon.
Logan: [whhispers] So, you can meet me out here tonight.
Rory: [whispers] Why are you whispering?
Logan: [whispers] Because your whispering.
Rory: Thats cute. So, Ill see you at your place? Eight o'clock?
Logan: Perfect.
Rory: See you then.

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[Rory, Logan, and the gang are at a pub - A folksinger is performing]
Finn: Met her
Colin: Cool, a girl on girl thing. Its a snuff film.
Finn: A lesbian snuff film.
Colin: A redundant lesbian snuff film. How INXS missed her, I dont know.
Logan: Raise a glass to INXS.
Finn: My countrymen, Im less than proud to say...
Colin: I cannot CANNOT believe theyve reinstated folk night at my beloved pub.
Finn: Its a travesty!
Juliet: Is there any alcohol left in the state of Connecticut thats not inside them?
Rosemary: I doubt it.
Logan: So, boys...another round?
Colin: Post haste! Barkeep!
Rory: You've hardly touched the drink in front of you.
Logan: Ah, but Im anticipating. You dont wait until the drinks done to order another, thats for amateurs.
Rory: Right. I forgot you went pro
Logan: So, boys, boys. When is the Life and Death Brigade going out again? We've been remiss.
Colin: I have ideas. Big ideas, potentially harmful ideas.
Guy: Hey, you mind?
Colin: Boyfriend?
Finn: Brother?
Colin: Or both? He could be Southern?
Logan: Hey, new drinking game! Every time the folk singer sounds sincere, we have to take a drink.
Juliet: Buckle your seat belt. It's going to be a long night.
Finn: Come on, start folding your own, gents. Whoever hits the folk singer first, wins.


[The streets are quiet as Rory and the group exit the pub patio. The guys are staggering. Colin and Finn head to Rory's car, which is parked across the street. Rory walks with Logan, who is so drunk he needs help walking]
Finn: Good Morning, New Haven!!! My, my you look fresh and appealing tonight!!!!
Man: SHUT UP!!
Finn: God has spoken to me, rather rudely!
Man: Shut up!!
Rory: Finn, keep it down.
Colin: Finn watch!! TOSTINGO!!!
[Finn immatates a machine gun]
Logan: Why are we leaving, Ace?
Rory: Because theyre closing.
Logan: Thats no excuse.
Rory: We've overstayed our welcome.
Logan: That makes me sad.
Rory: You've go to catch your plane in the morning.
Juliet: Have I gained weight?
Rosemary: Why?
Juliet: Finn didnt make a pass at me.
Finn: No, love, my brain is cloudy. Here I am making a pass at you. Pass! Pass!
Colin: Thats so expositional.
Rory: Guys, just get in the car.
Colin: [pause] Ive forgotten how to get into a car.
Finn: Me, too. Rory, do you have your owners manual with you, love.
Rory: Oh, my God, just get in!
Juliet: Wow, bon voyage.
Rosemary: Good luck with your rangling!!
Logan: One more drink.
Colin: OH, WE'VE GOT A RUNNER!!!
Rory: Logan!!
Logan: Hey, come on, let me in.
Rory: Logan, Theyre closed.
Logan: I have to apologize to that folk singer.
Rory: Shes not here, everyone is gone.
Logan: I hurt her feelings.
Rory: Shes a folk singer, shes used to it, come on.
Logan: I dont want to go to Omaha tomorrow.
Rory: I know.
Logan: Its boring.
Rory: I know.
Logan: And its not here.
Rory: Come on.
Logan: I dont like steaks, or insurance or football, or anything else that they have there.
Rory: You like steaks.
Logan: Do they even have electricity there?
Rory: Yeah. Yeah, they just got it last year.
Logan: Dont make me go.
Rory: Im not making you go, Im just trying to get you home.
Logan: But bringing me home, means that I have to go to sleep, then when I wake up I have to go on a plane to Omaha. Wheres Omaha? Wheres Omaha?
Rory: Just get in. Colin! Finn!!! Guys!!!

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[Rory comes out the front door, as Jess is throwing stones at the house]
Rory: What are you doing?
Jess: I didnt know if it was okay to ring or not.
Rory: Shes not here.
Jess: Shes not?!?!
Rory: Shes playing bridge tonight
Jess: Good. I parked on the street so she wouldnt see.
Rory: Youre very good at covert ops.
Jess: Years of practice. So, where do you want to go?
Rory: I dont know. I dont the area that well.
Jess: You live here.
Rory: I know, but Hartford is still a mystery. Even when I went to Chilton, I got right on the bus and headed home, so I dont even have any old high school hangouts to revisit, and these days Ive just been eating here.
Jess: Well, I would prefer not going somewhere that has the word food in the title.
Rory: Meaning?
Jess: Olive, Cheese, Soup, no Gardens, no plantations.
Rory: I got it. Somewhere funky.
Jess: Just steer me to the college district, I'll find us something funky.
Rory: Sounds good
[Logan drives up]
Rory: Logan!
Logan: Am I interrupting something?
Rory: No. Hey, when did you get back?
Logan: A couple of hours ago.
Rory: Oh, I thought you werent getting back until tomorrow.
Logan: I thought I'd surprise you, Ace.
Rory: Well, Im glad you did, because now you get to meet my old friend. Jess, this is Logan, my boyfriend. Logan, this is Jess, he's in from
out of town. [silence - as Logan and Jess size each other up] Wow, that sounded so grown up. We're at the age now where we say things like 'in from out of town' and 'old friend' cuz when you're young, all your friends are new. You have to get old to have old friends.
Logan: How ya doing?
Jess: Okay.
Rory: We were just gonna go grab a bite to eat.
Logan: What if we all go together, is that okay?
Jess: Okay by me.
Logan: Good.
Rory: Alright, good. We were actually lost on somewhere to go, so you saved us.
Logan: Call me Superman. [to Jess] Why dont you follow us?
Jess: Great.
[Logan leads Rory to his car]

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Logan: I live pretty close. I'd have you over to check it out, but its a bit of a mess.
Rory: And you dont serve food, so we would have been starving at your place.
Logan: I've got appetizers. Full bags of chips. Just check the expiration date before you dive in.
Jess: Im good with this place.
Logan: Little pointer. Dont come on folk night.
Jess: Yeah, Im not a big fan of folk music.
Logan: Something we have in comon.
Jess: Great.
Logan: Where is the waitress? Yo! Yo, right here. Another McKellan's Neat, and Jess, another brew?
Jess: I'm still working on this one.
Logan: Another one, just in case.
Rory: We should probably order. [to Jess] Its a big menu, so if you need guidance...
Jess: Im not hungry.
Logan: You're not hungry?
Jess: Nope.
Logan: I thought the whole point was that you two were gonna get something to eat.
Rory: And talk.
Logan: Well, yes, its a given that you're gonna talk while you eat, you know the chef de cuisine will gladly make any meal you want, if nothing there appeals.
Rory: The burgers are good here.
Jess: Maybe a burger.
Logan: Get one of those fancy ones too, and the meal is on me, so don't let the price stop you.
Jess: Ill pay for my own.
Logan: Good man. So, how long have you two known each other?
Jess: A while.
Logan: Did you date?
Rory: Yes, we used to date.
Logan: Ah...no hemming, no hawing, a good course of action. So, were you two high school sweethearts, rock around the clock, two straws and a milkshake?
Rory: Logan!
Logan: Hey, did we do cheers? I dont think we cheered, thats bad luck. Let's cheers.
Jess: I think we did already, twice.
Logan: Well, let's do it again. [raises his glass] Cheers. So, what do you do, Jess?
Jess: Oh, this and that.
Logan: Describe the this. Describe the that.
Rory: He writes.
Logan: You write? Impressive! What do you write?
Jess: Nothing important.
Rory: He wrote a book.
Logan: Oh! Did you pen the Great American Novel, Jess?
Jess: Wasn't quite that ambitious.
Logan: So what are we talking here, short novel? Kafka-length, or longer? Dos Pasos? Tolstoy, or longer? Robert Musil? Prust? Im not throwing you with these names, am I?
Jess: You seem very obsessed with length
Logan: I'm just trying to get a picture in my head, thats all.
Rory: Its a short novel.
Logan: Any good?
Rory: I haven't read it yet.
Logan: Yet? Well, At least you'll have one reader, thats something.
Jess: Yeah.
Logan: You know, I should just write down all my random thoughts, the stuff that happens to me, and conversations I have, and just add a bunch of he said she saids, and get it published. You gotta copy on you?
Jess: No.
Logan: You should send me a copy.
Jess: Sure, where do I send it? To the blonde dick at Yale?
Rory: Jess.
Logan: Woah, waoh, we're just trying to keep it friendly here, buddy. [Rory and Jess get up to leave]
Jess: Get out of my way.
Logan: Forget him, Rory.
Rory: Dont follow me.

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Logan: You're not gonna believe this. Over the music, the crowd, I hear one girl's voice cutting through it all. The folk singer, she's in the corner with her boyfriend. I sent them a round of drinks. What the hell? Is he gone?
Rory: Yes, hes gone.
Logan: Writers. They're so sensitive.
Rory: You were a jerk, Logan.
Logan: I was just challenging him. Geez. Hey, if Hemmingway can take it, so can he. Hey, if he wanted, he could have taken a pop at me. Pugnacity! Its a vital component of literary life. Again, consult your Hemmingway. Come on, do not let this guy get to you.
Rory: You're getting to me!
Logan: Me?
Rory: Yes. You were an ass.
Logan: Look, I'm sorry I came back early. I really messed things up here.
Rory: Jess wrote a book! He wrote a book, and you mocked him.
Logan: I did not mock him.
Rory: He's doing something.
Logan: Good. Fine, he's doing something, everybody in the world is doing something, more power to him.
Rory: I'm not. I mean, what am I doing? I'm living with my grandparents.
Logan: Thats temporary. Have a drink.
Rory: Temporary can turn into forever.
Logan: [seriously] You're not living with the Gilmore's forever.
Rory: I'm palling with my grandmother, I'm being waited on by a maid, I come home, and my shoes are magically shined, my clothes are magically cleaned, ironed, and laid out. My bed is magically turned down. I'm in the DAR? I'm going to meetings, and teas, and cocktail parties?
Logan: Again, temporary. Have a drink.
Rory: I'm wasting my time, partying and drinking. Just hanging out, doing nothing.
Logan: Woah, woah, woah....dont pull me into this.
Rory: I didn't say anything about you.
Logan: Yes, you did. Don't make me feel guilty for your drinking and partying. Thats your choice, I'm not forcing you. When I ask you out, you can say no.
Rory: Its all we do.
Logan: Its not all we do!
Rory: Its all you do.
Logan: Well, my perrogative, you know? Your damn straight, I'm gonna party, and I'm going to do it while I have the chance, because come June, my life is over!!!
Rory: OHHH....yes, your horrible life. Lets hear about it.
Logan: Gotta week?
Rory: You have every door opened to you. You have opportunities that anyone would kill for, including me.
Logan: No one is stopping you from making whatever you want happen. Go into journalism, go into politics, be a doctor, be a clown, do whatever you want!
Rory: Its not as easy when its not handed to you!
Logan: Really? Its all so easy for me? I dont want that life!! Its forced on me! You talk about all these doors being opened? All I is see one door, and Im being pushed through it! I have no choice!!! You try living without options!
Rory: How hard are you fighting it?!?
Logan: I didnt tell you to quit Yale, you did that! I gave you one month, you went beyond that month, it had nothing to do with me. It was all you! Now, you want to change, change it. But dont blame me, dont you dare blame me!!! You know what? Why dont you go off with Jay...Jack, whatever his name is.
Rory: Oh, I'm not going off with Jess!!
Logan: [sighs] Come on.
Rory: Where?
Logan: Go. Lets go, I dont want to be here.
Rory: I dont want to go.
Logan: Well, I drove, and I want to go.
Rory: I dont want to go!
Logan: Fine. I'll cover the bill, the cab, do whatever you want. Its your choice.