6.20 Super Cool Party People

[Rory arrives at the hospital, looking around, she goes to the front desk]
Rory: Excuse me, Im looking for Logan Huntzberger. [the nurse waves her away, she turns to another nurse.] Im sorry, can you help me...
Nurse: Sorry, this isn't my floor.
Rory: [yelling] Can someone here help me find Logan Huntzberger?!?
Nurse: He was just transferred out of the ICU. Room 713.
Rory: How is he?
Nurse: Are you family?
Rory: I'm his girlfriend.
Nurse: All I can tell you is that he's not conscious right now, and that he's in
serious bit stable condition.
Rory: What does that mean? Serious but stable?
Nurse: Just what it says.
Rory: But is it more serious or stable? I mean, which way is it leading?
Nurse: I'm sorry, but I can only release more information to family members.
Rory: But I'm his girlfriend. We've been together a long time, its not a
casual thing, we live together.
Nurse: Sorry.
[Rory walks towards Colin and Finn]
Rory: How is he? Is he okay?
Finn: Scuttlebutt is he's not dead.
Colin: The man is indestructable.
Finn: Dives head first off the cliffs of Caldera, instantly spins out of control
Colin: Gets totally disoriented, barely gets his shoot open.
Finn: Bounces over every rock and krag in the park.
Colin: Yet still manages to stick to landing.
Finn: We gave him a 9.7
Colin: Had to deduct 3/10ths for all the screaming and bleeding.
Rory: What about his family? Did you talk to them?
Colin: Honor is on her honeymoon, in Mykonos trying to get a flight back, and their mom checked herself into some sort of spa in Arizona the moment she heard.
Finn: When the going gets tough, the tough get hot rock massages.
Rory: What about Mitchum?
Finn: The Dark Lord? We left word but haven't heard anything back.
Colin: But we came up with a plan to get around the whole "only family gets
information" thing. We're adopting him.
Rory: What?
Finn: Logan will make a fine son.
COlin: But of course, we'll must be married.
Finn: Naturally, darling, I'm old fashioned.
COlin: Even then, adopting as a gay couple is never easy.
Finn: We just want to give love.
Colin: Oh, Finn...
Finn: Oh, Buttercup...
[Colin and Finn hold hands]
Rory: What the hell is wrong with you two?!? I mean, your best friend is lying unconscious in a hospital, and you dont even care!
Finn: Rory...
Rory: Why the hell aren't you two lying unconscious in there, huh?
Colin: Come on...
Rory: You don't care. Because if you did, you wouldn't be like this. You
couldn't. You're supposed to have his back, you're supposed to watch each out for each others on these stupid trips of yours! But no, everything is a big joke. Everything's hilarious. You're useless, just go home. Go home, I can't stand to look at you.
[Colin and Finn look ashamed as Rory storms away]

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

[Rory walks in the room, to find Logan unconscious. She is in shock, when
the doctor walks in]
Rory: Hi.
Dr. Schultz: Hello.
Rory: I'm Rory Gilmore, I'm his girlfriend.
Dr. Schultz: Im Dr. Schultz.
Rory: Ummm...how is he? Is he going to be okay?
Dr. Schultz: I'm sorry, but I really cant get into the specifics.
Rory: Well, he's out of the ICU, so thats good right? They wouldn't have moved him up here unless he was recovering.
Dr. Schultz: Sorry, really.
Rory: He's had surgery, right? Does he need more surgery? Does he have
broken bones? Because I can donate blood if you want.
Dr. Schultz: Miss...
Rory: You really...you can't tell me anything about what he has, or what you've done, or whats wrong...or anything?
Dr. Schultz: I'm sorry, its hospital policy. We're doing everything we can.
Rory: Okay...
[he leaves, and Rory looks over at Logan]

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

[Rory is sitting outside Logan's room, when she calls Paris]
Paris: What.
Rory: Paris?
Paris: Larry Summers is right, Rory. Our university system is crumbling,
did you know that?
Rory: Paris...
Paris: I just found out my microbiology final is an open book exam. Can you
believe that? I mean, why have us take the test at all? Why not just have
our professors take it for us? Or better yet, they can just hand us our
diplomas the moment we step on campus freshman year, along with some
government cheese, a bong, and a tshirt that says "Hard work is for suckers"
Rory: Paris. I'm at the hospital with Logan.
Paris: Why? What happened?
Rory: He and his buddies went on some stupid Life and Death Brigade trip,
and they parachuted off a cliff in Costa Rica, and he had a really bad fall.
Paris: Is he okay?
Rory: I dont know. Hes out of the ICU, so I guess thats a good thing. They
said he's in serious but stable condition. But they won't tell me anything else
because I'm not family.
Paris: Is he breathing on his own?
Rory: Yeah, I mean, I think so.
Paris: Well, What's his pallor? Was he peaked? Was there internal bleeding?
Rory: I have no idea. I quickly scribbled down some things off his chart.
You're pre-med, can I read it to you? Maybe you can
make some sense of it?
Paris: Forget it. I don't know how to read charts yet. I can tell you
everything you want to know about the difference between recessive and
dominant eye color genes in fruit flies, but God forbid I learn how to read a
chart before I'm a fourth year surgical resident.
Rory: Great.
Paris: What hospital is he in?
Rory: Columbia Presbyterian.
Paris: Who's the attending?
Rory: Paris, it doesnt matter. They're not going to give information to non family.
Paris: Just give me his name.
Rory: Dr. Schultz.
Paris: I'll call you right back.
Rory: Paris...
[Paris hangs up, and Rory sees the nurse agitated on the phone before giving
it to the doctor, who speaks in hushed tones. He hangs up, and Rory's phone
rings]
Rory: Hello?
Paris: Here's the deal. He was bleeding internally when they brought him in,
and they were worried about the oxegyn levels in his blood, but he's stablilized now, and they're back up to normal, so thats no longer a concern. He was also running a high fever, so they put him on mondo doses of intravenous antibiotics. He has a partially collapsed lung...
Rory: Oh my God!
Paris: Six broken ribs, a broken ankle, torn cartilige in both knees, and a
severe concussion. He had surgery for the lung, and that went well. They
did a thoracoscopy which is a couple of small incisions in the chest, and
they put a tube into the lung, to drain the fluid from the paral space
so the lungs could expand. That's way less invasive than a thoracotomy, which is a similiar operation, but for that one they have to butterfly you like a
shrimp, and thats it.
Rory: So what does this mean?
Paris: It means he's out of immediate danger. He's young, and healthy, and
they expect him to make a full recovery.
Rory: Really? Like, a full recovery? Like...he's going to recover...fully?
Paris: That's what the doctor told me. He'll need some rehab. He won't be
running, dancing or jumping off a cliff anytime soon, but yeah. He should be
fine. He's a very lucky guy. He could have died, those guys are idiots.
Rory: Wow.
Paris: Yeah
Rory: Thank you so much for this. Really, Paris. Thank you.
Paris: It was fun. Anything else?
Rory: No. I feel alot better.
Paris: Call if you need anything else
Rory: I will.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
[Lorelai is with Michel at the Inn when the phone rings]
Lorelai: Hello.
Rory: Its me.
Lorelai: Hey! How is he?
Rory: Well, I'm told he's going to be fine, but he looks awful, and he's been unconscious the whole time I've been here. It's really scary.
Lorelai: Awww....what happened?
Rory: He basically jumped off a cliff, and his parachute barely opened.
Lorelai: Oh my God!
Rory: Yeah. He has six broken ribs, a collapsed lung, a broken ankle,
contusions over a third of his body and a concussion.
Lorelai: Wow. Who else is there, what other family?
Rory: Well, Colin and Finn were here for a while but none of his family is here.
Lorelai: How did you get all that information? I thought they only allowed family members to-
Rory: Paris
Lorelai: God love her.
Rory: I'm sorry I didn't call sooner. I got you messages, I've just been so overwhelmed.
Lorelai: I'm just glad to hear from you. Is there anything I can do? Anything you need? It's been awhile since I've sent out a care package. You could be up to your eyeballs in Mad Libs, Silly String, malted milk balls...
Rory: No, I'm good. Colin and Finn went back to New Haven to get some stuff for me. I think I'm going to just hang out here for a while.
[Nurse approaches Rory.]
Nurse: Logan is awake, if you want to see him.
Rory: Oh, Mom, Logan's awake.
Lorelai: Ok, call me if there is anything you need.
Rory: Thanks, bye.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

[Rory walks into Logan's room]
Rory: Hey
Logan: (smiling) Hey.
Rory: You're awake.
Logan: Or hallucinating...pretty good hallucination.
Rory: (sighs in relief) Ah, you're awake.
Logan: I must look like crap.
Rory: Well, now I know why you never let me see you without your make-up on.
Logan: I guess maybe base jumping with very little preparation wasn't the
hottest idea
Rory: But you're going to be fine. You're going to make a full recovery.
Logan: Hey, RoboCop made a full recovery, look where that led him.
Rory: This is the best hospital in the city, and the best hospital in New
York City is basically the best hospital in the country. And that's basically
the best hospital in the world, so all in all you're in the best place you
could be, all things considered. [he tries to sit up] Hey, what do you
think you're doing? Lay down.
Logan: I'm really sorry about this.
Rory: It's okay.
Logan: No, it's not okay. I was showing off. I knew it wasn't safe on that
cliff, and I was so drunk, I was lucky to pull my shoot at all.
Rory: But you're going to be fine, and I will be here as long as you want
me to be. I've already located the good gift shop, and good cafeteria...
good being a relative term. And the maternity ward, in case I want to play
a little practical joke, swap the newborns around.
Logan: What about the paper? School?
Rory: I have my laptop, I can stay on top of my schoolwork. And Bill can
run the paper for awhile.
Logan: I don't want you to fall behind and miss too many classes. You've
already have enough to do without having to sit here and...
ROry: Logan, just relax. Get some rest. Il'l be here.
Logan: I'm glad.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

[Rory is on the phone with Honor]
Rory: I hate that your cutting your honeymoon short.
Honor: It's okay. With mom flaking out, I don't want to be here anymore.
We've got seats on a flight going out tonight, but its got a five hour layover in Ankora, so we're still trying to find something more direct. Either way, we should be there sometime tomorrow night.
Rory: Okay. So have you heard anything more from your dad?
Honor: Yeah, I just talked to him.
Rory: So, is he coming down here?
Honor: Nope.
Rory: He's out of town, too?
Honor: No, he's home. He's just not coming.
Rory: What?
Honor: Its the whole Life and Death Brigade thing. He's very against it.
ROry: But he was in the Life and Death Brigade.
Honor: Yes. But he feels he knew when to grow up and accept responsibility, and that Logan doesnt. He wanted his precious boy done with that by now, so he's boycotting.
ROry: He's boycotting his injured son? Logan had emergency surgery.
Honor: Hypocricy runs very deep in the Huntzberger family. Anyhow, forget
it. I'm sure Logan isn't expecting him. Okay, so I'll call later when I have
more flight information?
Rory: Okay. Bye.
[hangs up and takes out Logan's phone, dialing a number]
Rory: Mitchum Huntzberger? Yes. Its Rory Gilmore. I just thought I'd call
and remind you that Logan is lying in a hospital bed with a partially
collapsed lung, and a whole host of other potentially life threatening
injuries. And I'm figuring, a guy like you, surrounded by nothing but
a bunch of terrified sycophants might not have someone in his life with the
guts to tell him what an incredibly selfish, narcissistic ass he's being.
So, I thought, I'd jump on in. Swallow your pride, get in your car, and come
down here, and see your SON, now!

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

[Rory walks into Logan's hospital room]
Rory: Hey.
Logan: So my dad just left.
Rory: I saw.
Logan: I can't believe he actually visited. And he was only moderately
hostile, slightly condescending and no more self-centered than usual.
Rory: Well, its good that he came. Good for him. You feeling any better?
Logan: I am. Of course, that could have something to do with the 27
different medications they have me jacked up on.
Rory: I checked with the doctor. Its mostly cough syrup and baby aspirin.
Logan: What's wrong? I'm feeling better. [Rory looks away] What?
Rory: Im sorry.
Logan: About what?
Rory: About letting you go on this trip. I should have stopped you. I was
just so busy being mad at you, I didnt think I was trying to punish you, but I was trying to punish you.
Logan: No, Rory.
Rory: I should have stopped you.
Logan: Hey, you couldn't have stopped me. A team of psychiatrists with tranquilizer guns couldn't have stopped me. I was going no matter what. Its my fault. Do not feel guilty about this.
Rory: I just sent you out that door. I didn't even care. I was so cold. I
just...I could have lost you.
Logan: You didn't lose me.
Rory: But I could have, though.
Logan: Look, I'm the one screwing things up with us here, not you. I'm sorry
you're in the hospital right now. I'm sorry about all of this. I don't know
what is going on with me, but I'll get better. Okay? Things will calm down, I just need you to bear with me, okay? Okay?
Rory: Okay.
[Rory hold his hand, and runs her other hand through his hair. Logan smiles
at her]