6.22 Partings

[Logan is getting ready for his graduation]
Rory: Oh! Thats another good one!
Logan: No, its not.
Rory: Hold it. [snaps a picture]
Logan: Yo, Alfred Stieglitz, stop with the pictures.
Rory: I prefer Cartier-Bresson
Logan: My eyes are pale, very sensitive to the light.
Rory: You only graduate from college once. And I will document it to my hearts content, and you can't stop me. [takes another picture].
Logan: Well, at least I'm clothed in these.
Rory: Oh yes, those shower photos will fetch my a bundle on the internet.
Logan: I don't even know why Im doing this. Why am I doing this? This whole cap and gown thing?
Rory: Because the graduation ceremony is not only for the graduate, its for the loved ones, too. We talked about this.
Logan: No, you talked, and I disagreed.
Rory: And then I ruled, and thats that. [takes another picture]
Logan: I'm taking that Stalin biography away from you.
Rory: Come on, I don't want to be late.
Logan: You do realize your putting yourself in the crosshairs.
Rory: Meaning?
Logan: There will be all manner of Huntzbergers in the audience.
Rory: Oh, I can avoid people with the best of them.
Logan: I didn't say people, I said Huntzbergers.
Rory: Don't you worry your pretty little head about this. I'll take care of myself.
Logan: I just want you to be fully prepped.
Rory: Oh...I have outdone myself photographically. Every one of these is a keeper.
Logan: Okay, thats a close up of my naked butt, thats not a keeper.
Rory: You're right. Thats a screensaver.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

[Rory is sitting in the apartment, waiting, when she hears voices. She opens the door to see Mitchum and Logan talking]
Mitchum: I gotta go.
Logan: Yeah, I'll talk to you later. [to Rory] Hey
Rory: What happened?
Logan: It took longer than I thought.
Rory: Way longer. And Ive got to leave for my grandparents, like right now.
Logan: To top it all off, just as the family thing was winding down, a bunch of dad's business automotons came by, and he made me stay to talk shop.
Rory: To talk shop?
Logan: Cynergy, and new media ventures, and increasing shareholder value. I could hear my soul dying.
Rory: He's doing this on purpose.
Logan: I wouldn't put it past him.
Rory: Why is he doing this?
Logan: Look, don't think about him. Just...go. Go to your thing, get it over with, I'll wait for you here. Go.
Rory: Okay.
Logan: No more thoughts about Mitchum.
Rory: You're right, no more thoughts
Logan: Go.
[leaves the apartment as Mitchum gets on the elevator. She holds the door]
Mitchum: Oh. Hello, Rory. Were you at the ceremony? We didn't see you.
Rory: Yeah, I was there.
Mitchum: Didn't see you.
Rory: Well, I was there. Did you know that Logan and I had plans to go out after the ceremony? I mean, were you aware of that?
Mitchum: No, I was not.
Rory: Yeah...'cuz why would your son want to go out with his girlfriend the last day before he leaves, right?
Mitchum: Rory...
Rory: And this gathering of yours...it turns into a business meeting, on his graduation day? As if Logan's not going to have enough time for that during the year that you're forcing him to do in London?
Mitchum: It wasn't exactly a business meeting.
Rory: Why are you doing this?
Mitchum: Doing what?
Rory: Why are you taking him away from me? Why? Do you hate me that much?
Mitchum: I don't hate you.
Rory: Yeah, right
Mitchum: Why would I hate you?
Rory: Because I'm dating your son.
Mitchum: Logan's love life is his own business, I don't get involved.
Rory: Oh, please. You have done nothing but get involved.
Mitchum: How?
Rory: You're sending him away. Five thousand miles away. What other reason is there, but to seperate us?
Mitchum: Well, you flatter yourself, if you think I put that much energy into thinking about your relationship.
Rory: Here's the lobby.
Mitchum: Wait. Lets get this clear right now. Im sending Logan away for one reason, because it is time. It is time for him to stop jumping out of planes in a gorilla mask, and crashing boats, and getting plastered every night, and ending up in the hospital. Its time for him to stop being a child and to start being a man. Its time for him to start focusing on his future, and the only way he's going to do that is to get him out of his environment, and away from those dopes, Colin and Finn, and the Life and Death Brigade, and get him on a path. Logan is talented. He's talented, he's my son, I want him to achieve something, and he needs a push. Its what my father did with me, he pushed me, I grew up. And now Logan is going to grow up. Anything here you're not agreeing with? [Rory is silent] I didn't think so.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

[Logan gets off the elevator with Colin and Finn]
Colin: Come on, one more stop!
Logan: I can't.
Finn: But tomorrow you will fly away to London, and we will forget all about you.
Logan: I am touched. But Rory will be back in a minute.
Colin: You know, I'm starting to get the feeling you'd rather be with her than with us.
Finn: Impossible!
Logan: I appreciate the drinks and the diversion, your friendship over the years is worth at least a couple of pages in my memoir, but as of now, its good-bye. I'm spending the rest of the night alone with my girl.
Rory: [in a British accent] 'Ello, governor. Chips?
Logan: I'm sorry, I was looking for my girlfriend.
Rory: [leads him inside] Oh, I'm sorry, mate. No girlfriends here. Just us birds and blokes taking a piss out of each other.
Logan: Your accent is terrible, by the way.
Rory: Just go with it, you geezer. Now, we've heard that you're about to fly away to Old Blighty, and word around the pub has it, you're not terribly happy about it.
Logan: Well, I'm leaving a couple of people I'm pretty fond of...and some people I'm a little afraid of, but all in all...
Rory: Well, we're just going to have to change your mind. Because London, you see, is a place of fun and musical excitement! The Queen...Hello! Magazine...
Logan: You're gonna break into a chorus of Chim Chiminey any minute, aren't you?
Rory: Shoosh now. None of that talk, because tomorrow brilliant things will happen. A new life, a new adventure. You like adventure dont you, mate? Well London is certainly the place for that. And we, frankly, would not be the fine chaps we claim to be if we did not send you off in the proper way. With the batch of a lifetime! [everyone cheers] Come on, someone get this chap a pint! [in her normal accent] You see if you can't be happy, at least you can be drunk.
Logan: Kiss me, Mary Poppins.
Rory: Really? I thought it was more Gwenyth Paltrow, Shakespeare in Love.
Logan: Kiss me. [he kisses her]
Colin: To the Queen!
Finn: To the Queen!

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

[Rory and Logan are sitting on the couch, while the party is going on]
Rory: Want to put money on who nails the Queen?
Logan: I think her Highness is pretty safe tonight.
Rory: Why? I thought Jenny and Paul broke up.
Logan: They got back together this morning.
Rory: Do the boys know?
Logan: Nope.
Rory: Are you going to tell them?
Logan: Nope.
Rory: Oh, wow...watching your best friends waste precious scoring moments. You can get kicked out of the club for that.
Logan: Yeah, well. You know, I've given a lot of great parties in my lifetime..
Rory: Oh, I know.
Logan: But I do believe that this one has topped them all.
Rory: Hey, its not over. We have hours to go, there's plenty of beer left, and no one's slugged Finn yet, so...
Logan: Thank you.
Rory: My pleasure. You want more beer?
Logan: No.
ROry: More Twiglets, Cadburys?
Logan: Im good.
Rory: Do you want to try the fruit again? Because I think my cramp has gone away.
Logan: Tell me not to go.
Rory: What?
Logan: Tell me not to get on that plane. Tell me to blow off my father, the paper, the whole Huntzberger destiny. Just tell me I can figure something else out, just tell me not to go.
Rory: Well, I can't do that.
Logan: [pulls her close] Hey...you're afraid the teacher's going to see you, or something? [they kiss]

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

[Rory is asleep, when Logan rubs to wake her]
Logan: Rory...
Rory: Logan?
Logan: Don't get up.
Rory: You're dressed. Why are you dressed?
Logan: My bags already in the car.
Rory: The car?
Logan: Its downstairs. I just wanted to tell you...
Rory: [jumps out of bed] I'll be five minutes! I just have to find the closet.
Logan: Relax.
Rory: I just have to grab shoes and a coat
Logan: No.
Rory: No shoes, just a coat.
Logan: You don't have to come.
Rory: You're leaving! I have to go with you to the airport.
Logan: No.
Rory: I have to go to say good-bye.
Logan: Rory, no.
Rory: Yes. I have to wave to you at the gate.
Logan: They won't let you come to the gate, they'll stop you at security.
Rory: Ok, well...I'll wave to you at the metal detectors.
Logan: Rory.
Rory: I have to go with you.
Logan: No!
Rory: Yes! You are leaving for London. Who knows when we'll see each other again?
Logan: I thought that was all set.
Rory: What was all set?
Logan: With Christmas, Thanksgiving, Guy Falkes Day?
Rory: Thats so far away!
Logan: Rory. If you come with me, I won't get on the plane. I've paid for the apartment for the next year, so you don't have to worry about that. [Rory starts to cry] There's still a few weeks left on the car service, so use it whenever you want. I know that you wont, but just in case you need to. [he kisses her] I'll call you when I get in, okay? [he kisses her again, and she cries harder] What?
Rory: I keep trying to think of fabulous things to say, but all I can think is "Say hi to William and Harry for me."
Logan: I love you, Ace.
Rory: Thats so much better than "Say hi to William and Harry for me."
Logan: [he kisses her] I have to go.
[she watches him leave, crying...then runs after him. She gets to the door as he gets in the elevator. Rory holds up a hand in good-bye, as they both hold back tears]

6.21 Driving Miss Gilmore

[Rory is wheeling Logan out of the hospital]
Rory: Any physical therapist on the list will do, right, doctor? They're all on the same level?
Dr. Schultz: They're all top notch.
Logan: Thats if I need a physical therapist.
Rory: Hush, you. [to Dr. Schultz] And you said lots of rest, but is complete bed rest safest?
Logan: You can not confine me to a bed. Thats a violation of my civil rights.
Rory: Hush, you.
Dr. Schultz: You need to monitor his progress, everyone recovers at different speeds.
Rory: Okay. And when you say lots of fluids, does hot tea count, or just water? He likes hot tea.
Logan: You gotta stop talking about me as if I'm not here.
Rory: Logan.
Logan: Mom.
Dr. Schultz: Tea is fine. Water and juice are better.
Logan: And this wheelchair is absolutely necessary?
Rory: Hospital policy, sir.
Dr. Schultz: Just until you get out of the building.
Logan: Can we at least go faster?
Rory: No, you'll get G-forces
Logan: Doctor, can I go home to your house? I think I'll have much more fun there.
Dr. Schultz: You're in good hands. (to Rory) Just call if you have anymore questions.
Rory: I will. Thank you, Dr. Schultz. (turns to Logan) Okay, I cut off an old lady with a handicap sticker, so we got a primo spot right out front. Colin is meeting us at the apartment, to help me get you upstairs and in bed. And its a little cold outside, so you might need a scarf. I should have brought you a scarf. Maybe they have some in the gift shop, I should go check.
Logan: (points to his throat) Actually, there's something going on here.
Rory: What? Your throat? Is it sore? (leans down) Should I get Dr. Schultz? I mean, we're here, we might as well... (Logan kisses her)
Logan: Thank you for being who I want to get out of the hospital for.
Rory: You're welcome.
Logan: And I'm not cold, I'm fine.
Rory: You promise?
Logan: I promise.
Rory: Okay, lets go. We get to go at my speed.
Logan: Wake me when we hit the door.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

[Logan wakes up in the apartment]
Logan: Paris?
Paris: Male reproductive tract
Logan: What?
Paris: Seven up, seminiferous tubules, epidydimus, Vas Defrens. Ejaculatory duct, nothing, urethra, penis.
Logan: What are you doing?
Paris: Boning up, pardon the pun. Got my MCATs coming up, medical school.
Logan: I meant what are you doing here.
Paris: Looking after you.
Logan: Oh, goody.
Paris: Its necessary. You seem like the kind of lunkhead that would get up too soon, and inadvertedly push a broken rib bone into his spleen.
Doyle: Well, hey there, sleepyhead.
Logan: Oh, goody. A matching set.
Doyle: You sleep well?
Logan: (to Paris) He's watching me too?
Paris: Rory said it would be okay.
Doyle: Hey, now that you're awake, you mind if I switch the TV to the speakers? They're just about to reunite with their husbands, and I'd love to get the full surround experience.
Logan: Who?
Doyle: The penguins. You haven't seen the penguin movie?
Paris: The penguin movie rocks.
Doyle: They'll move you, my friend. So, is it okay?
Logan: Hey, mi casa es su casa. (starts to get up)
Doyle: Great.
Paris: Woah, woah, woah. Where do you think you're going, Cowboy?
Logan: Nature calls.
Paris: You can't get up. Rory said you need complete bedrest, she trusted me with your well-being. I can not betray that trust.
Logan: Then what's your suggestion for my cuurent predicament?
Paris: I'll get the bedpan. Where's your bedpan?
Logan: I don't have a bedpan.
Paris: You got tupperware?
Logan: Paris.
Paris: Doyle, watch him.
[Logan gets out his phone]
Doyle: Pausing.
Rory: [answers her phone at the Yale Daily News] Hey, why aren't you asleep?
Logan: Because I woke up.
Rory: You're supposed to be asleep.
Logan: I've been asleep for a week, my body's bored of sleep, it wants to do something.
Rory: Well, good thing your body has no say in the matter.
Bill: Hey, boss. You're going to want to see this.
Rory: Hold on a second
Logan: You've got to call of your sentries.
Rory: They're there for a reason
Logan: To reinact their favorite scenes from Misery?
Paris: You're kitchen needs organizing!
Logan: Yeah, I'll get right on that!
Doyle: You shouldn't talk loudly, you'll strain something.
Logan: I've got Dina and Mosha Abromowitz on top of me.
Rory: Why is Paris in the kitchen?
Logan: Oh, she's looking for a bedpan substitute.
Rory: Oh, dear.
Bill: You're really gonna want to see this.
Rory: Just leave it, Bill.
Bill: But I want to see the look on your face when you read it. Provided you still have a face after your head explodes.
Rory: In a sec.
Logan: Rory, look, I love your concern for me. I love that your so invested in my well-being, but even the doctor said that if I feel strong enough to move around, that I should do it, its good for me.
Rory: I don't know that the doctor knows what he's talking about.
Logan: You mean the John Hopkins graduate knows less than you?
Paris: I'd kill to get into John Hopkins. [places two tubberwares on the bed] Here, patient's choice.
Doyle: Oh, okay if I unpause?
Paris: Unpause.
Logan: Here come the penguins.
Rory: Look, maybe the doctor knows a little bit of what he's talking about.
Logan: You think?
Rory: So, I guess, get up. But super slow. It should look like a Monty Python routine you're moving so slow.
Logan: I'll make John Cleese proud.
Rory: And let Doyle help you, at least the first time, you could get dizzy.
Logan: I'll let him help me to the bathroom door, but I've got to take it from there, Ace.
Rory: Fine.
Doyle: I cannot look at this shot of the dead baby penguin.
Paris: Me neither. Dead people, yes. Not penguins.
Logan: You'll deal with Paris?
Rory: Put her on.
Logan: Thank you. Paris. [hands her the phone]
Paris: Can I look?
Doyle: We're clear.
Logan: Please talk to Rory.
Rory: (to Bill) What is so important about the Wall Street Journal?
Bill: Oh, you'll see.
Paris: Hey.
Rory: Stand down.
Paris: What?
Rory: Thank you for sitting with him, but I think he needs a little less hovering right now.
Paris: Warren Beatty Jr. smooth talk you?
Rory: No, even the doctor said he should be moving around, besides I think I've been a little overprotective.
Paris: You're call.
Rory: Have Doyle lend him a shoulder right now, okay?
Paris: Fine. Doyle, give Logan your shoulder. (gives the phone back to Logan)
Doyle: You got it.
Logan: See you soonish?
Rory: Just finishing up here.
Doyle: Mi shoulder es su shoulder. Hey, this is very life affirming, very penguin-esque, with the soundtrack music playing like that.
Logan: Hurry here, soonish.
Rory: I will. (hangs up and turns to Bill) What is it?
Bill: I've highlighted the appropriate section. [Rory reads the paper, and her expression changes] Oh, its going to be a quiet, slow-burning sieve. Disappointing.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
[Logan is sitting in bed, while Rpry paces beside the bed]
Rory: I could kill him!
Logan: You'd have to get in a very long line.
Rory: The man should be drawn and quartered.
Logan: There's no fast pass for the line, either. You just have to get in there, and wait.
Rory: Quartering is too good for him. He should be eigthed, sixteenthed!
Logan: I dont know, you quarter a guy, he's in four pieces. Thats tough to recover from.
Rory: He should be stretched on the rack, iron maidened, strappadoed!
Logan: Oh my God, what is strappadoed?
Rory: When you suspend them in the air, with a rope tied to his hands, that are tied behind his back.
Logan: You're scaring me with your knowledge of torture.
Rory: I did a paper on the Attorney General, it comes with the territory.
Logan: Life in modern America?
Rory: Why would the Wall Street Journal print this? Why?
Logan: It was an interview with my father, if he said it to them, they get to print it.
Rory: Even if its a flat out lie?
Logan: They don't know that.
Rory: "I look for the best and the brightest, even at the intern level."
Logan: Reading it again, your just torturing yourself.
Rory: "Ben Cochran at Harvard, he helped me out with my Boston paper, as did Frank Williams. And Rory Gilmore, I gave her her first internship at my Stamford paper, and now she's the editor of the Yale Daily News" AH! (sits on the couch)
Logan: Its classic Mitchum.
Rory: How dare he! I gave her her first internship?
Logan: This is one of dad's things, Rory. Grabbing credit wherever he can, whether its earned or not.
Rory: Everyone in America has read this.
Logan: The Wall Street Journal's readership is high, but its not quite 300 million.
Rory: Well enough people have read it.
Logan: Look, the beauty of a daily paper is its in everybodys recycling bin the next morning, it will totally be forgotten.
Rory: It won't.
Logan: It will.
Rory: I remember everything I read. Front page, op ed, concert reviews, it never leaves. My eyes accidentally flit over an obituary, as I'm hunting for the Metro section, and I can remember the deceased's first wife's name. [Logan starts to get up and out of bed] a full month afterward, and thats just a flit, not a perussal. If I perused it, I could give you his grandkids in alphabetical order, five years later.
Logan: [Hops towards Rory] Ace, Ace, you drinking this in?
Rory: What?
Logan: Helen Keller just signed water, Annie.
Rory: You walked!
Logan: All by my lonesome. You proud of your boy?
Rory: I'm very proud. (hugs him) Oh, and your color is coming back...you've gone from white to off-white.
Logan: Hey, can we get to the bottom line on this article here?
Rory: Give it to me.
Logan: Its all good, its very positive, what he said about you. A powerful man is citing you as one of his accomplishments. Its in no way a diss.
Rory: I know.
Logan: Its actually a good thing, so you should let it go.
Rory: Never.

6.20 Super Cool Party People

[Rory arrives at the hospital, looking around, she goes to the front desk]
Rory: Excuse me, Im looking for Logan Huntzberger. [the nurse waves her away, she turns to another nurse.] Im sorry, can you help me...
Nurse: Sorry, this isn't my floor.
Rory: [yelling] Can someone here help me find Logan Huntzberger?!?
Nurse: He was just transferred out of the ICU. Room 713.
Rory: How is he?
Nurse: Are you family?
Rory: I'm his girlfriend.
Nurse: All I can tell you is that he's not conscious right now, and that he's in
serious bit stable condition.
Rory: What does that mean? Serious but stable?
Nurse: Just what it says.
Rory: But is it more serious or stable? I mean, which way is it leading?
Nurse: I'm sorry, but I can only release more information to family members.
Rory: But I'm his girlfriend. We've been together a long time, its not a
casual thing, we live together.
Nurse: Sorry.
[Rory walks towards Colin and Finn]
Rory: How is he? Is he okay?
Finn: Scuttlebutt is he's not dead.
Colin: The man is indestructable.
Finn: Dives head first off the cliffs of Caldera, instantly spins out of control
Colin: Gets totally disoriented, barely gets his shoot open.
Finn: Bounces over every rock and krag in the park.
Colin: Yet still manages to stick to landing.
Finn: We gave him a 9.7
Colin: Had to deduct 3/10ths for all the screaming and bleeding.
Rory: What about his family? Did you talk to them?
Colin: Honor is on her honeymoon, in Mykonos trying to get a flight back, and their mom checked herself into some sort of spa in Arizona the moment she heard.
Finn: When the going gets tough, the tough get hot rock massages.
Rory: What about Mitchum?
Finn: The Dark Lord? We left word but haven't heard anything back.
Colin: But we came up with a plan to get around the whole "only family gets
information" thing. We're adopting him.
Rory: What?
Finn: Logan will make a fine son.
COlin: But of course, we'll must be married.
Finn: Naturally, darling, I'm old fashioned.
COlin: Even then, adopting as a gay couple is never easy.
Finn: We just want to give love.
Colin: Oh, Finn...
Finn: Oh, Buttercup...
[Colin and Finn hold hands]
Rory: What the hell is wrong with you two?!? I mean, your best friend is lying unconscious in a hospital, and you dont even care!
Finn: Rory...
Rory: Why the hell aren't you two lying unconscious in there, huh?
Colin: Come on...
Rory: You don't care. Because if you did, you wouldn't be like this. You
couldn't. You're supposed to have his back, you're supposed to watch each out for each others on these stupid trips of yours! But no, everything is a big joke. Everything's hilarious. You're useless, just go home. Go home, I can't stand to look at you.
[Colin and Finn look ashamed as Rory storms away]

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

[Rory walks in the room, to find Logan unconscious. She is in shock, when
the doctor walks in]
Rory: Hi.
Dr. Schultz: Hello.
Rory: I'm Rory Gilmore, I'm his girlfriend.
Dr. Schultz: Im Dr. Schultz.
Rory: Ummm...how is he? Is he going to be okay?
Dr. Schultz: I'm sorry, but I really cant get into the specifics.
Rory: Well, he's out of the ICU, so thats good right? They wouldn't have moved him up here unless he was recovering.
Dr. Schultz: Sorry, really.
Rory: He's had surgery, right? Does he need more surgery? Does he have
broken bones? Because I can donate blood if you want.
Dr. Schultz: Miss...
Rory: You really...you can't tell me anything about what he has, or what you've done, or whats wrong...or anything?
Dr. Schultz: I'm sorry, its hospital policy. We're doing everything we can.
Rory: Okay...
[he leaves, and Rory looks over at Logan]

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

[Rory is sitting outside Logan's room, when she calls Paris]
Paris: What.
Rory: Paris?
Paris: Larry Summers is right, Rory. Our university system is crumbling,
did you know that?
Rory: Paris...
Paris: I just found out my microbiology final is an open book exam. Can you
believe that? I mean, why have us take the test at all? Why not just have
our professors take it for us? Or better yet, they can just hand us our
diplomas the moment we step on campus freshman year, along with some
government cheese, a bong, and a tshirt that says "Hard work is for suckers"
Rory: Paris. I'm at the hospital with Logan.
Paris: Why? What happened?
Rory: He and his buddies went on some stupid Life and Death Brigade trip,
and they parachuted off a cliff in Costa Rica, and he had a really bad fall.
Paris: Is he okay?
Rory: I dont know. Hes out of the ICU, so I guess thats a good thing. They
said he's in serious but stable condition. But they won't tell me anything else
because I'm not family.
Paris: Is he breathing on his own?
Rory: Yeah, I mean, I think so.
Paris: Well, What's his pallor? Was he peaked? Was there internal bleeding?
Rory: I have no idea. I quickly scribbled down some things off his chart.
You're pre-med, can I read it to you? Maybe you can
make some sense of it?
Paris: Forget it. I don't know how to read charts yet. I can tell you
everything you want to know about the difference between recessive and
dominant eye color genes in fruit flies, but God forbid I learn how to read a
chart before I'm a fourth year surgical resident.
Rory: Great.
Paris: What hospital is he in?
Rory: Columbia Presbyterian.
Paris: Who's the attending?
Rory: Paris, it doesnt matter. They're not going to give information to non family.
Paris: Just give me his name.
Rory: Dr. Schultz.
Paris: I'll call you right back.
Rory: Paris...
[Paris hangs up, and Rory sees the nurse agitated on the phone before giving
it to the doctor, who speaks in hushed tones. He hangs up, and Rory's phone
rings]
Rory: Hello?
Paris: Here's the deal. He was bleeding internally when they brought him in,
and they were worried about the oxegyn levels in his blood, but he's stablilized now, and they're back up to normal, so thats no longer a concern. He was also running a high fever, so they put him on mondo doses of intravenous antibiotics. He has a partially collapsed lung...
Rory: Oh my God!
Paris: Six broken ribs, a broken ankle, torn cartilige in both knees, and a
severe concussion. He had surgery for the lung, and that went well. They
did a thoracoscopy which is a couple of small incisions in the chest, and
they put a tube into the lung, to drain the fluid from the paral space
so the lungs could expand. That's way less invasive than a thoracotomy, which is a similiar operation, but for that one they have to butterfly you like a
shrimp, and thats it.
Rory: So what does this mean?
Paris: It means he's out of immediate danger. He's young, and healthy, and
they expect him to make a full recovery.
Rory: Really? Like, a full recovery? Like...he's going to recover...fully?
Paris: That's what the doctor told me. He'll need some rehab. He won't be
running, dancing or jumping off a cliff anytime soon, but yeah. He should be
fine. He's a very lucky guy. He could have died, those guys are idiots.
Rory: Wow.
Paris: Yeah
Rory: Thank you so much for this. Really, Paris. Thank you.
Paris: It was fun. Anything else?
Rory: No. I feel alot better.
Paris: Call if you need anything else
Rory: I will.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
[Lorelai is with Michel at the Inn when the phone rings]
Lorelai: Hello.
Rory: Its me.
Lorelai: Hey! How is he?
Rory: Well, I'm told he's going to be fine, but he looks awful, and he's been unconscious the whole time I've been here. It's really scary.
Lorelai: Awww....what happened?
Rory: He basically jumped off a cliff, and his parachute barely opened.
Lorelai: Oh my God!
Rory: Yeah. He has six broken ribs, a collapsed lung, a broken ankle,
contusions over a third of his body and a concussion.
Lorelai: Wow. Who else is there, what other family?
Rory: Well, Colin and Finn were here for a while but none of his family is here.
Lorelai: How did you get all that information? I thought they only allowed family members to-
Rory: Paris
Lorelai: God love her.
Rory: I'm sorry I didn't call sooner. I got you messages, I've just been so overwhelmed.
Lorelai: I'm just glad to hear from you. Is there anything I can do? Anything you need? It's been awhile since I've sent out a care package. You could be up to your eyeballs in Mad Libs, Silly String, malted milk balls...
Rory: No, I'm good. Colin and Finn went back to New Haven to get some stuff for me. I think I'm going to just hang out here for a while.
[Nurse approaches Rory.]
Nurse: Logan is awake, if you want to see him.
Rory: Oh, Mom, Logan's awake.
Lorelai: Ok, call me if there is anything you need.
Rory: Thanks, bye.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

[Rory walks into Logan's room]
Rory: Hey
Logan: (smiling) Hey.
Rory: You're awake.
Logan: Or hallucinating...pretty good hallucination.
Rory: (sighs in relief) Ah, you're awake.
Logan: I must look like crap.
Rory: Well, now I know why you never let me see you without your make-up on.
Logan: I guess maybe base jumping with very little preparation wasn't the
hottest idea
Rory: But you're going to be fine. You're going to make a full recovery.
Logan: Hey, RoboCop made a full recovery, look where that led him.
Rory: This is the best hospital in the city, and the best hospital in New
York City is basically the best hospital in the country. And that's basically
the best hospital in the world, so all in all you're in the best place you
could be, all things considered. [he tries to sit up] Hey, what do you
think you're doing? Lay down.
Logan: I'm really sorry about this.
Rory: It's okay.
Logan: No, it's not okay. I was showing off. I knew it wasn't safe on that
cliff, and I was so drunk, I was lucky to pull my shoot at all.
Rory: But you're going to be fine, and I will be here as long as you want
me to be. I've already located the good gift shop, and good cafeteria...
good being a relative term. And the maternity ward, in case I want to play
a little practical joke, swap the newborns around.
Logan: What about the paper? School?
Rory: I have my laptop, I can stay on top of my schoolwork. And Bill can
run the paper for awhile.
Logan: I don't want you to fall behind and miss too many classes. You've
already have enough to do without having to sit here and...
ROry: Logan, just relax. Get some rest. Il'l be here.
Logan: I'm glad.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

[Rory is on the phone with Honor]
Rory: I hate that your cutting your honeymoon short.
Honor: It's okay. With mom flaking out, I don't want to be here anymore.
We've got seats on a flight going out tonight, but its got a five hour layover in Ankora, so we're still trying to find something more direct. Either way, we should be there sometime tomorrow night.
Rory: Okay. So have you heard anything more from your dad?
Honor: Yeah, I just talked to him.
Rory: So, is he coming down here?
Honor: Nope.
Rory: He's out of town, too?
Honor: No, he's home. He's just not coming.
Rory: What?
Honor: Its the whole Life and Death Brigade thing. He's very against it.
ROry: But he was in the Life and Death Brigade.
Honor: Yes. But he feels he knew when to grow up and accept responsibility, and that Logan doesnt. He wanted his precious boy done with that by now, so he's boycotting.
ROry: He's boycotting his injured son? Logan had emergency surgery.
Honor: Hypocricy runs very deep in the Huntzberger family. Anyhow, forget
it. I'm sure Logan isn't expecting him. Okay, so I'll call later when I have
more flight information?
Rory: Okay. Bye.
[hangs up and takes out Logan's phone, dialing a number]
Rory: Mitchum Huntzberger? Yes. Its Rory Gilmore. I just thought I'd call
and remind you that Logan is lying in a hospital bed with a partially
collapsed lung, and a whole host of other potentially life threatening
injuries. And I'm figuring, a guy like you, surrounded by nothing but
a bunch of terrified sycophants might not have someone in his life with the
guts to tell him what an incredibly selfish, narcissistic ass he's being.
So, I thought, I'd jump on in. Swallow your pride, get in your car, and come
down here, and see your SON, now!

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

[Rory walks into Logan's hospital room]
Rory: Hey.
Logan: So my dad just left.
Rory: I saw.
Logan: I can't believe he actually visited. And he was only moderately
hostile, slightly condescending and no more self-centered than usual.
Rory: Well, its good that he came. Good for him. You feeling any better?
Logan: I am. Of course, that could have something to do with the 27
different medications they have me jacked up on.
Rory: I checked with the doctor. Its mostly cough syrup and baby aspirin.
Logan: What's wrong? I'm feeling better. [Rory looks away] What?
Rory: Im sorry.
Logan: About what?
Rory: About letting you go on this trip. I should have stopped you. I was
just so busy being mad at you, I didnt think I was trying to punish you, but I was trying to punish you.
Logan: No, Rory.
Rory: I should have stopped you.
Logan: Hey, you couldn't have stopped me. A team of psychiatrists with tranquilizer guns couldn't have stopped me. I was going no matter what. Its my fault. Do not feel guilty about this.
Rory: I just sent you out that door. I didn't even care. I was so cold. I
just...I could have lost you.
Logan: You didn't lose me.
Rory: But I could have, though.
Logan: Look, I'm the one screwing things up with us here, not you. I'm sorry
you're in the hospital right now. I'm sorry about all of this. I don't know
what is going on with me, but I'll get better. Okay? Things will calm down, I just need you to bear with me, okay? Okay?
Rory: Okay.
[Rory hold his hand, and runs her other hand through his hair. Logan smiles
at her]

6.18 The Real Paul Anka

[Rory is getting dressed at Logan's apartment]
Logan: Hey you.
Rory: Hey.
Logan: Did you get in late last night?
Rory: I was studying.
Logan: Hmmm....I missed my class this morning.
Rory: Bummer.
Logan: Clock didn't go off, I thought I set it right.
Rory: Oh, I reset it. I had to catch up on some sleep. I didn't know you set it for early.
Logan: Its an honest mistake.
Rory: Maybe we should get a second clock.
Logan: Might be wise. So will you be available to grab a bite later?
Rory: Maybe.
Logan: Can't see that far into the future?
Rory: Its crazy right now.
Logan: I'll check in with you later.
Rory: We'll see how it goes.
[Rory goes to leave, and Logan reaches for her arm, kissing her]
Logan: Have a good day.
Rory: You too. [she leaves and Logan looks less than happy]

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

[Rory is walking around the newsroom, and stops at Paris's desk looking at a large jar]
Rory: Uh...Paris? What's going on here?
Paris: I just need ten more minutes. I took a 'delete boring answers path' on my interview with Professor Whittington, and ended up with a tidy 16-word piece. His wife must want to suck a tailpipe every night. I'm putting stuff back in now.
Rory: I meant with the big jar of disgusting insects?
Paris: Oh. They're fruit flies. I'm finishing an important paper on population genetics, and I have to monitor how often Drosophilia Molanagaster do the nasty.
Rory: Gross!
Paris: Complain to God, not me.
Rory: Well, did you have to bring them into the newsroom?
Paris: Well, I can't leave them home. They could escape and infest my apartment.
Rory: Meaning they could escape and infest the newsroom.
Paris: At least no one sleeps in the newsroom, and if they bring food, and flies get in the food, maybe thats how they learn to swallow the no food in the newsroom rule.
Rory: We don't have that rule.
Paris: We should.
Rory: Get them out of here.
Paris: I need nine minutes.
Rory: Paris....
Paris: Eight and a half. Come on, you want the interview, I gotta keep typing.
Rory: Ok, nine minutes.
Paris: Thanks.
[Logan walks up to Rory]
Logan: Hey, Chief, you got a minute?
Rory: Umm...a minute.
Logan: I'm a little confused about something.
Rory: How can I help?
Logan: I was working on a piece about textbook prices, you assigned it to me a couple of weeks ago.
Rory: Uh huh.
Logan: It wasn't going to earn me my Pulitzer, but I already put alot of work into it, and I just checked the server and noticed that a piece on the same topic has already been written.
Rory: Yes, it has been.
Logan: Our wires get crossed?
Rory: Nope.
Logan: Who wrote it?
Rory: I did.
Logan: Why?
Rory: Its topical, it effects every student. Its an important story, I wanted to be sure that it would get done.
Logan: It wasn't due for two more days.
Rory: I didn't think you'd make the deadline.
Logan: Based on what?
Rory: Based on past performance
Logan: Past performance is no indication of future performance
Rory: Wise men call that a sucker's maxim.
Logan: I did alot of research on this thing. I interviewed textbook publishers, I interviewed authors, I was going to get more quotes from students.
Rory: I know. I used your research alot of it came in handy.
Logan: Really?
Rory: The stuff that I could make sense out of.
Logan: Good.
Rory: Look, you'll get your byline if thats what this is about.
Logan: You know thats not what this is about.
Rory: I thought I was doing you a favor.
Logan: Everyone knew I was assigned that piece, and now they know its been taken away from me.
Rory: Logan, I'm sorry. Its as you said, our wires got crossed. It happens, let's move on.
Logan: Ok, we'll move on. [notices Paris' jar] And whats with this?
Paris: Keep walking, Whitey.
Logan: You let fruit flies in the newsroom?
Rory: Its not hurting anybody.
Logan: Its disgusting.
Paris: I just need five more minutes.
Rory: Don't rush, Paris. [to Logan] The fruit flies are not hurting anybody. And Paris, is working on something that I am waiting on. I would prefer it, if she werent interrupted.
Logan: Sorry, Paris. [he walks away]

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

[Rory gets back to the apartment, to find Logan there with Colin, Finn and Robert]
Logan: The bottle is dry.
Colin: You cannot be out of Wild Turkey.
Logan: I've got everything else under the sun. Pick one and stop your nagging.
Colin: YOU cannot be out of Wild Turkey.
Logan: No matter how many times you tell me I'm not out, doesn't change the fact that I'm out.
Finn: Hands! [shoots a poolball]
Robert: Jerk.
Rory: Hi, everyone.
Colin: Hey, Rory. Get yourself a drink, anything but Wild Turkey.
Rory: I'm ok.
Logan: Yeah, forget it. She doesn't drink on school nights.
Rory: I sometimes do.
Colin: I'm getting a sense that the woman of the house had no idea we were going to be here.
Finn: Ok that we're here, love?
Logan: Of course its okay.
Finn: Logan, I haven't called you love since that sultry night in Bimini.
Rory: Its fine that you're here, guys. You're always welcome. What's with the maps?
Colin: Graduation is imminent, Rory. So, we are planning the ultimate Life and Death Brigade event.
Finn: Not only the ultimate, but the penultimate.
Colin: Penultimate means next to last, Finn. This is the last one.
Finn: I thought it meant super-ultimate.
Robert: How did you get into Yale?
Finn: Slept with the recruiter.
Rory: So, what's the stunt?
Colin: We're flying on a twin engine plane, to a remote spot in Costa Rica, we don parachutes, and base jump off a cliff whose height is....
Robert: Exactly 36 hundred and 24 feet...unless thats a two.
Colin: We land on the banks of the San Juan River.
Finn: Hopefully not in the river.
Robert: Or on the Nicaraguan side of the river.
Logan: Or in Panama.
Colin: We inflate a raft, white water three miles down to a meeting point, where a blow out party will take place.
Robert: Its a two, gents. I'm pretty sure its a two...or an eight.
Rory: Where do you get the inflattable rafts?
Logan: One of us will parachute with it in our packs.
Finn: Not me, I've got the DVD player.
Colin: Not me, I've got the champagne and the bong.
Robert: If I take it, it will crush the cigars.
Logan: Stand down, boys. I'll jump with the raft.
Rory: You're planning this all very carefully, right?
Colin: Luckily, we've got a topographical map expert in our midst.
Robert: Its a three. Im 90% sure.
Rory: Why don't you make extra sure you have the right number there, Robert?
Logan: Hey, let the man do his thing.
Rory: Well, I would, if the man doing his thing werent drunk, and hadn't forgotten to put on his reading glasses.
Robert: Oh my God! I'm not wearing my glasses.
Colin: They flew off when you did that impression of the old guy getting shot by Dick Cheney.
Rory: Who's flying this twin engine airplane? And who's supplying the parachutes? I mean, there must be a weight limit to make that jump, right? Do you guys know what the weight limit is?
Logan: So, you just came home to piss on the fun.
Rory: No, I came home because I live here.
Colin: You know, guys, maybe we should resume our planning another time.
Logan: Yeah, I guess maybe we should.
Robert: I'll never be able to refold these.
Colin: Just grab them, and lets go, Robert.
Finn: Okay, if I return this another time?
Logan: Sure.
[the guys leave]
Rory: Go with them, if you want.
Logan: Is it your life mission to embarass me at every opportunity you get?
Rory: Its Robert, Colin, and Finn, Logan. I've seen them all dance naked with their underwear on their heads. There's no embarassing you in front of them.
Logan: Well, you embarassed me tonight.
Rory: How? By pointing out that the stunt your planning doesnt exactly sound safe?
Logan: Its called the Life and Death Brigade, Rory.
Rory: Yeah, and aren't you supposed to avoid the death part?
Logan: This is not your business. And why aren't you at the paper? You're always at the paper this time of night.
Rory: I finished early.
Logan: How? Did you delegate a little? Let people actually write their own articles?
Rory: Thats old news.
Logan: Its not old news. You knew that would embarass me, and you didnt care.
Rory: Please!
Logan: Even when we're together, you're someplace else. You leave, and you don't kiss me good-bye, we're at dinner, and you're on your cell phone the whole time. You never leave notes anymore, about where you're going to be, so I have no idea where you are. You haven't forgiven me.
Rory: What are you talking about?
Logan: For the girls I was with when we were seperated.
Rory: I said I forgive you.
Logan: Yeah, you said it, but you haven't, though. You haven't! I'll be at the pub.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

[Rory comes into the living room where Logan is packing]
Logan: I guess I'm going.
Rory: Okay.
Logan: I'll be out of cell phone range for a couple of days.
Rory: I know.
Logan: I'll see you.
[he leaves]

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

[Jess walks up to Rory]
Jess: You don't have to read it again.
Rory: I know I don't.
Jess: There are so many thing I would change in it.
Rory: Like what?
Jess: I'd keep the back cover, everything else goes.
Rory: You know why I love your book?
Jess: Why?
Rory: It doesn't remind me of anything. Its not a rip-off. Its just you.
Jess: High praise, Miss Yale Editor.
Rory: Well, I don't get to write as much as I would like. Im mostly assigning, and motivating, hand holding, rewriting...
Jess: And you love it, every minute of it. Come on, tell me you don't.
Rory: I do. I do love it. Its exciting.
Jess: You look happier than when I saw you last.
Rory: I am.
Jess: So, you fixed everything?
Rory: Yeah, everything's fixed.
Jess: I'm glad you're here.
Rory: Me, too. [Jess slowly leans in to kiss her, as he deepens the kiss she pulls away]
Jess: What?
Rory: I'm sorry.
Jess: About what?
Rory: About coming here...like this. I just got the flier, and I don't know, I just wanted to see your place. But then, this...its not fair to you, God, I'm such a jerk.
Jess: What are you talking about?
Rory: I couldn't even cheat on him like he cheated on me.
Jess: Who? Who cheated on you? That guy? You're still with him.
Rory: Yeah.
Jess: I thought everything was fixed.
Rory: Everything but him.
Jess: I hate this.
Rory: You should. I'm sorry.
Jess: You came here, alone...to Philadelphia.
Rory: He was out of town.
Jess: I don't deserve this, Rory.
Rory: No, you don't. You don't deserve it. I just...I'm in love with him. Despite all the bad he's done, I can't help it. I'm in love with him.
Jess: Love, huh?
Rory: Yeah.
Jess: I guess I'll call Matthew's poet and have him explain love to me. They know all about it, right?
Rory: They're supposed to. Well, I guess I'd better go.
Jess: Okay.
Rory: I'm so sorry I came here.
Jess: I'm not. It's what it is. You...me. Where'd you park?
Rory: I'm right outside.
Jess: Hey! If it makes you feel better, you can always tell him that we did something.
Rory: Thanks, Jess. [she leaves]

6.17 I'm Ok, You're Ok

Rory and Paris are sitting on the couch, eating Chinese food]
Paris: I say we repaint.
Rory: Did you ever paint?
Paris: No. Doyle doesnt believe in improving someone else's property.
Rory: Men!
Paris: Yeah, men.
Rory: Well, [i]we[/i] will repaint.
Paris: A new color scheme for a new era.
Rory: I'll eat to that.
Paris: This is going to be great. You and me in a freshly painted apartment, no men, just lots and lots of Chinese food.
Rory: We are going to get huge.
Paris: Its okay. We'll get a treadmill.
Rory: Yeah, You always wanted a treadmill.
Paris: I did. But Doyle thought 'why get a treadmill when you can walk outside?'
Rory: With all the murderers and rapists.
Paris: Thats what I would say. Im glad you're back.
Rory: Me too. You know Paris, Im really sorry about the whole editorship thing.
Paris: Its okay.
Rory: I didnt lobby for the job, I mean...I swear, I had no idea.
Paris: Forget it. I mean, who are we kidding? I am not cut out to deal with people. I was made to be in a lab or an operating room, or a bunker somewhere with a well behaved monkey by my side. Im sorry, too. You know, for throwing you out.
Rory: Consider it even.
[there's a knock at the door]
Paris: Did we actually order that pizza?
Rory: I thought it was just discussed.
Paris: Who is it?
Logan: Its Logan.
Rory: I dont want to talk to him!
Paris: I got it.
[Paris opens the door, but keeps the chain on]
Paris: Well, well, if it isnt New Haven's favorite whorehound.
Logan: Is Rory here?
Paris: Yes.
Logan: Can I talk to her?
Paris: No. You can talk to me. [she unchains the door] What do you want to talk about? Life, love, common symptoms of sexually transmitted diseases?
Logan: Rory...
Paris: Rashes, sores, insanity...
Logan: Five minutes, please!
Paris: You know, there are a few things Ive always wanted to say to you, but out of respect for my friend, Rory, here, Ive refrained. However, the circumstances seem to have changed.
Logan: You dont know what you're talking about, Paris.
Paris: I know you cheated on Rory.
Logan: I did not cheat on Rory!
Paris: Are you going to deny it? Are you serious?
Logan: We were apart!
Paris: Oh, please!
Logan: We were! We werent together. Why the hell am I arguing with you? I dont want you back.
Paris: You, Logan Huntzberger, are nothing but a two bit, spoiled waste of a trust fund. You offer nothing to women, or the world in general. If you were to disappear off the face of the earth tomorrow, the only person who would miss you is your porsche dealer.
Logan: (to Rory) Want to chime in here?
Rory: No. I think Paris has got it covered.
Logan: Ok, thats it. [pushes past Paris]
Paris: Hey!
Logan: Rory, I just need sixty seconds.
Rory: Go away, Logan.
Paris: No one invited you in. Get out right this second, before I go Bonaduce on your ass.
Logan: Im not going away, Im not going anywhere. We're going to talk.
[Doyle walks in]
Doyle: What the hell is this door doing unlocked?
Paris: What are you doing here?
Doyle: I want to talk to you
Paris: I told you to go.
Doyle: You did, and I did. I left, and went out and got drunk, and I thought about why I left and why I got drunk, and I realized that you are wrong.
Paris: I am not. And what are you wearing?
Doyle: Dont change the subject!
Logan: (to Rory) Can we go in the other room?
Doyle: We're supposed to be together, Paris. You know it, I know it, and your life coach knows it!
Paris: Terrence has been wrong before. When I wanted to get the page boy haircut, remember?
Doyle: Paris, listen to me. I am the best thing that ever happened to you.
Paris: Well, if thats true, then its all uphill from here.
Doyle: You know, I didnt have to come back here begging for you to talk to me. I have options.
Paris: Right.
Doyle: I do! In fact, I almost hooked up with a really hot chick tonight.
Rory: I dont see how thats going to help your case, Doyle. At all. (to Logan) You know what, fine. Lets take this out into the hall.
Paris: You could have hooked up with a hot chick?
Doyle: Yes.
Paris: In rhinestone buttons? Who was it Sheila E?
(Rory and Logan go out into the hallway)
Rory: Two minutes. Go.
Logan: Look, I understand that you're upset, and I really wish that you hadnt found out like that. But Rory, I love you. You know that I love you. When I said that I was your boyfriend, I agreed to be faithful to you, which, by the way, was a first for me. And I thought it would be hard, but it wasnt. Then I asked you to move in with me. I asked you to move in with [b]me[/b], and I thought that was going to be hard, but it wasnt. I have been completely faithful to you, Rory. I have not been with another girl, I have not looked at another girl, I have not even thought about another girl.
Rory: Except for Walker, Alexandra...
Logan: We were broken up, Rory.
Rory: No, you were.
Logan: I thought we were broken up, I thought thats what the fight was. I thought thats what the seperation was. Do you believe me? Do you believe that I honestly thought we werent together?
Rory: I guess....
Logan: So then, if you believe that. That I thought we werent together, then in my mind, I was not cheating on you.
Rory: I guess.
Logan: So then, if you believe that in my mind I was not cheating on you, do you think you can forget what those vipers said today, put it behind you, and just come home with me? Come on, Rory. Just come home with me, lets forget this crappy day ever happened. Just go home. Do you want to make a pro/con list?
Rory: Do not mock my pro/con lists!
Logan: I am not mocking you pro/con lists. I actually think the list will come out in my favor.
Rory: Well, Id have to tell Paris Im going.
Logan: Absolutely. Tell Paris you're going.
Rory: (opens the door) Woah!! Oh!
Logan: What?
Rory: They made up. Either that, or Krav Maga is way kinkier that I thought it was.
Logan: Well, you can tell her tomorrow. After all, it is tomorrow.
Rory: Yeah, I can just call her from home.
(Logan takes her hand]
Logan: We okay?
Rory: Yeah.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

[Rory walks into Logan's apartment]
Logan: Where the hell have you been?
Rory: Oh, I went to Stars Hollow to visit my mom for a couple of days.
Logan: You went to Stars Hollow?
Rory: Yup.
Logan: You could have told me, Ace. Left a note, called, something.
Rory: Yeah, I know, I should have.
Logan: I mean, I wake up, and you're gone.
Rory: I didnt mean to freak you out.
Logan: I kept calling your cell. I must have called it a hundred times,
Rory: Oh, yeah. Well, my cell died, and my charger was here, of course. I have to buy an extra one, you keep telling me that.
Logan: Finally, I check in with the paper, and they told me youve been emailing stuff, so at least I knew you were alive.
Rory: I am so sorry, it just became this whole thing. My grandparents stopped by unexpectedly, which took forever. And, anyhow, its a long story, it wont happen again. I should take a shower.
Logan: Rory.
Rory: Yeah?
Logan: You sure everything's okay?
Rory: Yeah, fine.

6.16 Bridesmaids Revisited

[Rory is in the apartment, in front of a mirror, as music blares in the background]
Logan: HEY! [he goes up to her when she doesnt respond]
Rory: AHH! Oh, you scared me!
Logan: Sorry.
Rory: What?
Logan: Sorry!!
Rory: What????
Logan: [turns down the music] Sorry.
Rory: I guess that was a little loud.
Logan: What????
Rory: Sorry!
Logan: Im telling you we should take this on the road. I see you went with Faye Dunaway in Network.
Rory: And some Maureen Dowd 'come hither' pumps for good measure.
Logan: I wish I could be there for you.
Rory: Oh, you do not.
Logan: I do to.
Rory: You would be asleep in three minutes
Logan: The pumps would have kept me going for at least four. Im in a suit at two o'clock, in the afternoon. Honor has to everyone dressed for a wedding rehearsal. How did I get conned into this?
Rory: Into what?
Logan: Being one of Josh's groomesmen.
Rory: You like Josh.
Logan: I dont even know Josh.
Rory: He's going to be your brother in law.
Logan: Yes, exactly. Going to be. Key word is going. He's not now.
Rory: Your tie is crooked.
Logan: But as of today, Josh is simply the guy who holds my sister's purse when she goes shopping, and because of that, I have to spend the next six hours practicing how to walk in a straight line.
Rory: You have yet to accomplish that, so the practice wouldnt hurt.
Logan: Im not there and Im bored already.
Rory: You could always talk to your good friend, Flasky.
Logan: Right! Thanks for the reminder. I just dont understand wedding rehearsals. The bachelor party, I get.
Rory: I bet you do.
Logan: The actual ceremony, I get. But the rehearsal I dont get.
Rory: Wallet?
Logan: And after we finish rehearsing, I have to sit through a five course dinner surrounded by my new family, and Honor's bridgade of moronic bridesmaids.
Rory: Oh, come on. You love Honor. Her friends cant be that bad.
Logan: Oh, no. Blondie, Dipsy, Bubbles, Four Nose Jobs and Charm McGee, all great gals.
Rory: Meow.
Logan: Seriously, cant you just do the panel, blow off the mixer, and meet me for the dinner?
Rory: Logan....come on. By the time I get out of there, and get back here to change, drive all the way to New York, dinner would be over.
Logan: No, it wouldnt. Dinner is never going to be over. Its gonna last forever.
Rory: I will be here, waiting for you when you get back. [leads him to the door] And I will have aspirin.
Logan: Fine. Ill be back by eleven. Ten of eleven, possibly ten thirty.
Rory: Go
Logan: Fine. [he leaves, then rushes back in.]
Rory: Did you forget something?
Logan: [rushes up and kisses her] You look incredible. Knock them dead. [kisses her again, and leaves]

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

[Rory and Logan walking into the Country Club where Honor's wedding is being held]
Rory: It feels like a labrynith.
Logan: Well, if you feel yourself getting lost, just keep your hand on one side of the wall, and keep walking. Eventually you'll find you way out, or get eaten by a minotaur.
Rory: Thanks, chum.
Logan: Josh, my man, whats going on?
Josh: My cufflinks have been stolen.
Logan: Dont worry, Im very good at finding things. At Easter Egg hunts, they used to make me wear an eye patch just to keep things fair.
Josh: Okay, but I suspect thievery.
Logan: You sure you'll be okay hanging out by yourself for a while?
Rory: For at least a fortnight. I'm good. Go, put on your eye patch and find some cuff links.
Logan: [kisses her] I'll see you later. [to Josh]Come on, Josh. Dead man, Walking!
Rory: Excuse me. I'm looking for the library?
Staff Member: Sure. It's in the east wing. You --
Honor: Rory!
Rory: Hey bride, you look beautiful.
Honor: You like my wedding sweats? I'm beginning to think 'Town & Country' might not approve.
Rory: So... how are you doing?
Honor: Okay. You have got to come back and hang out with me and the bridesmaids.
Rory: That's sweet, but I can't. I actually have all this work --
Sofia: Ladies, c'mon, makeup time. And whoever took Josh's cuff links, hand them over. [Walker hands them to her]
Honor: Look, the girls have cracked open a case of champagne. I need you to be my designated dresser. I'm the bride. You can't say 'no' to a bride. It's bad luck.
Rory: I guess I could do my work tomorrow.
Honor: That's always been my motto. C'mon All day, if anyone does something I don't want them to, I'm saying it's bad luck. I swear, getting married is so fabulous. 9leads her to the bridal suite) Everybody, so this is my lovely friend, Rory. Rory's going to hand out with us while we get ready. Some of you may have met at the shower, but this is Alexandra, Walker, Claude, and Megan.
Rory: Hi.
Walker: Welcome to the final hours of Honor's maidenhood.
Alexandra: Yeah right. Honor's maidenhood didn't make it to upper school at Brearly.
Honor: Not true. Turks and Caicos, 1996
Megan: Anyway, we're here to celebrate these last, precious hours before we lose Honor to the dark side.
Walker: And to celebrate, we drink booze.
Honor: Not me. I'm having one glass, right before the ceremony.
Alexandra: Whatever you need to tell yourself.
Claude: Ooh, I love that dress, Rory.
Rory: Oh, thanks.
Megan: Is that Carolinas?
Rory: Um, no. It's mine.
Honor: Oh, Rory, this is Italo. Italo is a genius. If they gave MacArthur grants for hair, he'd get one.
Sophia: Okay, girls. I need to get you in these chairs, pronto
Walker: (hands a glass to Honor) Bridezilla?
Honor: Okay, but just one now and one right before the ceremony.
Alexandra: Whatever you need to tell yourself.
Honor: I need it to make a toast. To friends, old and new. Borrowed and blue. You guys are awesome
Walker: To Honor and to Honor's honor! The missing maidenhood.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

[Rory is with a gowned Honor and the bridesmaids]
Honor: Okay, so I don't look obese?
Megan: You look like a skeleton.
Walker: A beautiful, blushing skeleton.
Honor: Whoa
Rory: What?
Honor: All of a sudden, the idea of marriage seems totally archaic and insane. Legally binding one woman with one man until they die? It's perverse. Why on earth do people do this? Why am I doing this?
Walker: Uh-oh. Freak-out
Claude: You love Josh. Remember?
Honor: Oh yeah. Josh. Okay...Okay. Freak-out over. I wonder if Josh is freaking out.
Megan: We saw him before when we took a smoke break. He looked nervous.
Honor: Oh, adorable. Hey, can somebody check my sling-back for me? It feels messed up and I can't reach my own feet.
Walker: Certainly. Oh yes, the sling-back is not slung back properly. I think I can remedy this. If I just sling this back -- [Champagne spills on the floor.]
Honor: Did that get on my dress? Someone tell me if I need to freak-out.
Megan: The Veuve did not get on the Vera.
Honor: Oh my god. Get away from me, you lousy drunk.
Walker: Hey! That's offensive. I am a terrific drunk.
Honor: I need my designated dresser.
Rory: At your service.
Honor: Make sure it's secure, because I plan on dancing tonight.
Claude: Speaking of dancing, has anyone warned Rory about the quote-unquote dignitaries coming to this shindig? It's always the same culprits.
Rory: I need warning?
Alexandra: The ambassador from Luxembourg is very handsy.
Megan: No, the one you have to watch out for is that poet. What's his name?
Walker: The dude with the red face?
Megan: He just did a translation of the Bhagavad-Gita. Anyway, he acts like he's gay. but it's such a ruse. Total perv.
Rory: Feet, red face, not gay, Bhagavad-Gita, perv. Got it.
Sofia: I'm going to steal the bride to take a couple of quick pictures. Honor, honey, grab your veil. The rest of you -- three minute warning.
Rory: You are dance-floor ready.
Honor: Thank you, my dear. See you soon, everybody.
Sofia: Head that way, toward the sitting room. We don't want Josh to see you in your dress. It's bad luck.
Honor: Please. Like I care about things like that.
Megan: I look like a drag queen.
Walker: My hair is insane.
Alexandra: I totally want your hair. My hair looks like Linda Carter's. Italo was punishing me.
Walker: I'll tell you what I want. I want to hook up with someone tonight.
Alexandra: Just remember that pinning guys in the corner and shoving your tongue down their throats can sometimes come off as desperate.
Walker: But, I am desperate. I swear, I might go home with the ambassador from Luxembourg.
Claude: Oh c'mon, there'll be plenty of eligible bachelors there tonight.
Walker: Like who?
Claude: The groomsmen for starters.
Alexandra: Tripp Wallison is looking good.
Megan: You always think he's looking good.
Alexandra: Cause he always is. Anyway so do you.
Claude: Alexandra and Megan both have both slept with Tripp.
Rory: Small world
Alexandra: I'm with Liam. You can have Tripp.
Walker: Tripp's too short. I'm over the whole Mia Farrow, Woody Allen thing.
Claude: How about Josh's brother?
Walker: Poor man's Josh. Really poor man's. He's the Josh they give away at the soup kitchen.
Alexandra: There's always Logan.
Walker: Been there, done that.
Rory: What?
Claude: Shush!
Walker: What, 'shush'? You should talk.
Claude: Rory is Logan's girlfriend.
Walker: Oops. Oh my god, you're Rory, Rory. I'm so retarded. Don't worry, this was way before you started dating. This was back around Thanksgiving.
Rory: Last Thanksgiving?
Walker: It meant nothing, believe me. Meaningless.
Megan: Walker will have sex with anyone.
Walker: I will.
Claude: And I'm sure you know Logan and I dated. But that was ages ago, eons, back when he drove a Z3. And then we had a stupid one-night stand this December. But there's noting between us, I swear. We're just friends who drank too much spiked eggnog. And now he's met you, and I think you guys are so great together. Really.
Rory: Thanks.
Alexandra: (to Walker) I sorry, I didn't know you had sex with Logan. I thought you two just messed around.
Walker: No, you said you just messed around with him. I said he and I hooked up. I meant hooked up, hooked up.
Alexandra: I thought you meant hooked up. Liked messed around.
Megan: How come you never told me you messed around with Logan? Why am I out of the loop?
Alexandra: I'm with Liam. Officially, nothing happened. These shoes are killing my feet.
Walker: Just crunch up your toes a little bit. That's what I'm doing. Feels good.
Rory: Did you hook up with Logan around Thanksgiving?
Megan: No way. I was in Biarritz.
Sofia: Okay, Ladies! Time to line up; the processional's about to start. Rory, you better go find you seat.
Megan: I look like RuPaul.
Walker: Where are my flowers? Does Sophia have the flowers?
Claude: See you at the party, Rory.
Alexandra: (to Rory) Oh, just FYI, before I got together with Liam, he slept with half the upper east side, and now he's as loyal as a dog.
Walker: I need my flowers! Oh...I have my flowers.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

[Rory is still sitting in the bridal suite, now alone, when Logan walks in]
Logan: Here you are.
Rory: Here I am.
Logan: I was looking all over for you. I didnt see you when I was walking down the aisle, I looked for you during the ceremony. Where were you?
Rory: Here
Logan: Here? You missed the wedding?
Rory: I'll apologize to Honor later.
Logan: Forget Honor. Whats going on? Rory?
Rory: You didn't say a word. You just let me walk into a room full of girls you'd had sex with. Oh, no wait. Im sorry. You just had sex with two of them, on of them, you just fooled around with. Whatever that means. She spared me the exact perimeters of the fooling around. You want to fill me in?
Logan: Rory...
Rory: You know what? Nevermind. Ive got a good imagination, I can figure it out.
Logan: Okay, look....
Rory: I cant believe it. You didn't just cheat on me. You REALLY cheated on me.
Logan: I didn't cheat on you.
Rory: So, you didn't sleep with....
Logan: No, I did. But we were broken up.
Rory: No. You were broken up, not me. I thought we were just taking some time.
Logan: Apart. Not seeing each other.
Rory: Yes, taking some time. Not seeing each other for awhile, that doesn't mean broken up.
Logan: Oh, come on...
Rory: No. When...to break up you have to tell the other person. You cant just decide, that your broken up and go off and....God! I cant believe I fell for all your stupid tricks! The coffee cart, and going to my mother. You went to my mother. Why would you bother going through that? You had plenty of back up. What do you need me for?
Logan: Because I love you.
Rory: No. Don't.
Logan: Rory. I didn't cheat on you, I didn't lie to you!
Rory: You didn't tell me.
Logan: Of course not, why would I tell you? Why would I want you to be hurt and upset and angry?
Rory: Blondie...Dizzy...I love the cover...pretending all those were worthless idiots.
Logan: They are worthless idiots. Shooting their mouths off in front of you, like that.
Rory: Its not their fault!
Logan: It is their fault. They love doing crap like this, causing trouble.
Rory: We were only apart for like two seconds, and you managed to sleep with everyone of your sister's friends. How did you even do that? I mean, did you work them in shifts? Were there charts, signals, B12 shots?
Logan: I was depressed. I was lonely, I was upset. Ive known these girls forever. It was just companionship, okay? It meant nothing.
Rory: Dont be at the apartment between 10 and 1 tomorrow, so I can get my stuff.
[she storms by, he tries to grab her arm, but she brushes him away, walking away]

6.15 A Vineyard Valentine

[Logan wakes up, and sees Rory rushing around the apartment]
Logan: Hey.
Rory: Hi.
Logan: Why are you up?
Rory: Its 11:04. The whole world is up.
Logan: Keith Richards isnt up. Pete Dougherty isnt up.
Rory: Rory Gilmore is up.
Logan: She shouldn't be. You're making me dizzy. (rubs his eyes)
Rory: I forgot my Thucydides.
Logan: I don't see how you can function without your Thucydides.
Rory: Hey, I'm trying to squish four semesters into three. If I slow down, I'll get whoomped
Logan: How long have you been up?
Rory: Five hours, four cups of coffee, two bagels.
Logan: No partridge? No peartree?
Rory: Ok, Thucydides did not just grow legs and walk away.
Logan: Come back to bed (pulls her next to him)
Rory: I can't!
Logan: We see each other less since we've been living together.
Rory: I know it seems that way.
Logan: It is that way.
Rory: We'll have time.
Logan: Not unless we make time. Lets go away this weekend.
Rory: This weekend is bad.
Logan: Every weekend is bad.
Rory: This one is particularly bad.
Logan: They're all bad. Now come on, its Valentine's Day.
Rory: Thats not until next week.
Logan: This weekend is Valentine's weekend. Come on, lets go somewhere.
Rory: I can't.
Logan: Rory.
Rory: Even if I did get some time away, I promised my mom Id try to hang out with her, even if it was just for dinner. I haven't seen her in ages.
Logan: But she doesn't kiss as good as I do.
Rory: You don't know that.
Logan: True.
Rory: No, she's just been a little down lately. I kind of want to cheer her up.
Logan: Well, then invite her along. We could have a kissing contest.
Rory: Bring my mother?
Logan: Yeah, and tell her to bring that guy she's with. What's his name? Luke?
Rory: Really? You'd be up for that?
Logan: Absolutely.
Rory: Well, I'd have to drop a lot of things.
Logan: Thats what things are for, to be dropped.
Rory: I'll think about it.
Logan: You promise?
Rory: Yes. Now you have to let me go.
Logan: Thats the worst offer I've gotten all day. You're Thucydides is on the pool table.
Rory: Thank you! (runs to get it, as Logan lies back down in bed, smiling)

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

(Rory opens the door to the Huntzburger compound, letting Lorelai and Luke in)
Rory: You made it!
Lorelai: We made it!
Rory: Hi, Luke.
Luke: Hey, sorry we're late.
Rory: You're not late.
Lorelai: It took longer than we thought. The ferry and all. Did you know Martha's Vineyard is an island?
Rory: Well I've been here before.
(Logan walks up to them)
Logan: Hey, there's our intrepid travelers.
Lorelai: Hi, Logan.
Logan: Welcome. And this must be Luke.
Lorelai: Oh, no. I dumped Luke. This is Clem, I picked him up at a truck stop on 95. We were at the register, paying for our blue plates, and our hands reached for the same Dixie Chicks cassette.
Luke: Luke Danes
Logan: Logan Huntzberger. Good to have you. Anything else to unload?
Luke: No, there's a few things, but Ive got it.
Logan: Great.
Rory: (to Lorelai, leading her into the house) So, this is the place.
Lorelai: Oh, great!
Rory: This is the den, and the dining room, which seats 20, the wet bar.
Lorelai: (gasps) This keeps getting better!
Rory: And thats the the living room, kitchens up there, and the ocean's out there, but you cant see it.
Lorelai: Oh, ripoff!
(Logan and Luke walk in)
Logan: So, you guys hungry?
Luke: We're fine. We ate on the road.
Rory: Cool. Just a few peculiarities about the house.
Logan: Its a grandma, so its got its kinks
Rory: Some of the hardwood floors buckle, so watch your step.
Logan: The frenchdoors are warped from the winter, so you have to give them a yank when you open them.
Rory: And that noise you may hear outside your window in the morning...
Logan: That would be Stan.
Lorelai: Gardner?
Rory: Raccoon.
Logan: He's been living on the property longer than my family has, so we give him free reign.
Rory: And the showers. There are three of them, run any two at the same time, and they turn to ice. So give everybody a heads up before take a dive.
Lorleai: Oh, good to know.
Rory: And in the morning, we'll have stuff here to eat, or you can up the stree to Joe's Cafe for breakfast, they open at 8.
Logan: 7, actually.
Rory: Right, 7. We never go before 8. But...thats all. Want to see your room?

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

(Lorelai walks into the kitchen, were Rory and Logan are reading the newspaper)
Lorelai: Morning!
Logan: Good morning!
Rory: Hi. We've got coffee and pastries over there.
Logan: The best pastries on the island.
Rory: Yeah, you got to get them early, or they run out.
Logan: Even the prune is good.
Rory: She will not like the prune.
Logan: She'll like this prune.
Lorelai: They look great.
Rory: Where is Luke?
Lorelai: He's waiting for my signal.
Rory: You're signal?
Lorelai: To come out. He wants a signal its okay.
Logan: We've got a flare gun in the garage.
Rory: Luke! Its okay. Come out!
Luke: Morning.
Logan: Hey, Luke.
Rory: Luke, you know. You dont have to hide.
Luke: I wasnt hiding. Did you say I was hiding?
Lorelai: I did not say that.
Logan: Help yourself to whatever.
Rory: You have to read faster.
Logan: I read at my own pace, regardless of peer pressure.
Rory: But my article's continued in the section you've been reading since before John wrote his gospel.
Logan: I keep telling her we need two papers.
Rory: Thats wasteful. We dont need two papers.
Logan: We need them for the health of the relationship. (she grabs it out of his hand, and starts reading) There's your proof. We got eggs and stuff too, Luke.
Lorelai: You still hungry?
Rory: Still? Did you guys eat?
Luke: No, we just ate a big dinner last night.
Lorelai: Right. Hey, why dont we take a little walk first, huh? The beach is deserted we'll have the whole thing to ourselves.
Logan: You might want to take a coat.
Luke: Im fine.
Logan: Cool.
Lorelai: We wont be long.
(Logan looks at Rory, and grabs the paper back)
Rory: Rats.
Logan: You snooze you lose.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

(Luke and Logan are playing basketball at the gym)
Logan: Its probably the shoes.
Luke: The shoes are fine.
Logan: Yeah, but they're a size too small, and their low top.
Luke: I bought what they had. Shoes are fine.
Logan: Its a drag you didnt bring your own gear.
Luke: Yeah, its a drag. Lets get going here. Im playing all out, so you play all out.
Logan: You're overestimating my skills if you dont think Im playing all out. So, its what? 5 to 1?
Luke: 6. You got 6. 6 to 1.
Logan: Right. 6 to 1. (Logan scores again) Sorry.
Luke: Dont apologize.
Logan: That was a foul, too. I charged.
Luke: No, you barely touched me.
Logan: I travelled.
Luke: You didnt foul me, and you didnt travel.
Logan: Okay. Did you try to loosen the laces?
Luke: Just check the ball. 6-1?
Logan: 7, actually.
Luke: Right, right. 7.
Logan: Sorry.
Luke: Dont apologize.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

(Logan and Luke walk inside, where two guys are massaging the girls)
Logan: Hey, guys. Whats going on?
Lorelai: Oh, wow. I was like in a zen trance. I was totally somewhere else.
Rory: Me, too. I was in Greece. Where were you?
Lorelai: Berghdoff Goodman's.
Rory: When you reach your zen trance, you go to Berghdorff Goodmans?
Lorelai: To each his own. Thanks Ron and Jerry.
Rory: Yeah, thanks, guys.
Logan: I didnt know the gym had masseurs.
Rory: They dont.
Lorelai: Ron and Jerry work for the laundry service but they missed their calling.
Luke: You got the laundry guys to give you a massage?
Rory: Never underestimate the persuasive powers of Lorelai Gilmore. So, you guys have fun throwing the old hoop around?
Logan: Or something to that effect.
Lorelai: (to Luke) Look at you. You look like a walking billboard for the Martha's Vineyard Chamber of Commerce.
Luke: It was all they had.
Rory: So who won the game?
Luke: These shoes stink!
Lorelai: So, you beat the shoes?
Logan: Nobody won, we just had fun. So, do you girls need to clean up at all?
Lorelai: From...????
Logan: Right. Well, I guess we'll just see you out here.
Luke: We'll just be about ten minutes.
Rory: Okay, see you in ten. (to Lorelai) So what do we do?
Lorelai: Ron? Jerry? You got ten minutes? I love working out.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

(Lorelai walks into the kitchen, where Rory is making a salad)
Lorelai: I'm sorry. But this picture just did not compute.
Rory: Stop.
Lorelai: You're wielding a knife. That is verboten in Gilmore world.
Rory: You forget, that Im a rebel.
Lorelai: And you're wearing an apron!
Rory: Its so my clothes dont get wrecked.
Lorelai: You have not worn an apron since you saw the Sound of Music, and you put one on so you could look like Sister Maria. And you made a big crucifix out of popsicle sticks. (Rory gets something out of the drawer) Ahh...
Rory: What?
Lorelai: The way you went in that drawer and got that thing-a-ma-bob out of there, like thats what you intended all along.
Rory: It was.
Lorelai: You know where things are.
Rory: I've cooked here before.
Lorelai: I may need to be recucitated.
Rory: Okay, do you want to help, or do you want to keep on doing this?
Lorelai: I want to help.
Rory: Okay, Logan is taking care of the lobsters for us outside, and I am making a salad, mashed potatoes, and bruschetta.
Lorelai: (picks something up) What's this?
Rory: (takes it from her) A garlic press.
Lorelai: (picks up a knife) This could definitely do a foot.
Rory: (takes it away from her) Step away from the knife.
Lorelai: (picks something else up) What's this!
Rory: (takes it from her) That a lemon zester.
Lorelai: Let me zest a lemon!
Rory: No.
Lorelai: But I get to do something!
(Luke walks in)
Rory: But you cant just grab things. (to Luke) Hi, Luke.
Luke: Hey.
Rory: (to Lorelai) Wash your hands, and Ill give you a task.
Lorelai: Excellent!
Luke: Food looks good.
Lorelai: Rory's gonna let me chop something.
Luke: Is that wise?
Rory: I did not say chop.
Lorelai: Alright, Im all ready.
Rory: (hands Lorelai a small knife) Ok, chop the celery.
Lorelai: Yay! Hey, thats a dinner knife!
Rory: (hands her the bigger knife) Okay, just be careful, please.
Lorelai: I am Mario Batani's and Ina Garten's love child.
Rory: (to Luke) Logan is outside dealing with the lobsters, if you want to join him. He was very nice, by the way. He kept them very well hidden from me when they were, lets just say, not dead.
Lorelai: Not dead? Ugh. I dont like behind the scenes food stuff.
Luke: I'll just go see whats going on out there.
Rory: What did you mean, it would do a foot?


(Luke walks up to Logan who is at the grill with the lobsters)
Logan: Hey, they kick you out of the house?
Luke: Kind of.
Logan: Do you like lobster?
Luke: Ive never had lobster.
Logan: I think you'll like it if I dont screw it up. Making lobster is a time honored Huntzberger family tradition. Its in our blood.
Luke: Great.
Logan: So FYI, I'm probably gonna do the present thing at dinner.
Luke: The present thing?
Logan: Just want to give you a heads up, don't want to complicate your life.
Luke: You got Rory a present?
Logan: For Valentine's Day. Forget?
Luke: No.
Logan: Ok
Luke: I just didn't get anything.
Logan: Oh.
Luke: I mean, Valentine's Day isnt technically til Tuesday.
Logan: Sure.
Luke: Ive got a couple of extra days.
Logan: Right.
Luke: Is there anything open neaby?
Logan: Only if you want to buy her a windbreaker or some boating equipment.
Luke: Oh.
Logan: Look, I went a little nuts, and got two things for Rory. Let me give you one to give to Lorelai.
Luke: No, no, no, no.
Logan: Yes. I got a necklace and a tennis bracelet. She doesnt need both. Take one, whichever one.
Luke: I cant do that.
Logan: Dude, its Valentine's Day. You've got to give your girl a gift.
Luke: Well....maybe I will take one.
Logan: Which one.
Luke: How about the necklace?
Logan: Perfect.
Luke: Mainly because I have no idea what a tennis bracelet is.
Logan: Let me finish up getting these on, and I'll take you inside and show them to you. I left them in the car so Rory wouldn't find them.
Luke: You really dont have to do this.
Logan: I'm happy to. We men have to stick together.
Luke: Okay.


Lorelai: This is fun
Rory: You have got to stop doing that.
Lorelai: I love this squishy feeling.
Rory: You're gonna overmash them
Lorelai: Is there such a thing as overmashing potatoes?
Rory: Yes. Its called potato soup.
Lorelai: Ya know...you can put on the apron, and shout out things like 'dice the carrots' but implying you can overmash potatoes proves your a phony.
Rory: You're the one who thought the potato masher was a waffle shaper before I corrected you.
Lorelai: Ow. I think Im giving myself mashed potato elbow. Would you like more chef juice?
Rory: More wine would be great. So, have I told you what we're thinking for the end of the school year?
Lorelai: What who is thinking?
Rory: Logan and I. Get this...Asia.
Lorelai: Asia? Wow.
Rory: Well, some of Asia. China, Thailand, Vietnam...we're thinking 6 weeks.
Lorelai: Sounds exciting, hon!
Rory: We havent finalized anything yet. But I've bought the books, doing the research.
Lorelai: Wow, its official. You've become to fabulous to hang out with me.
(the guys walk in)
Logan: Hows it going in here?
Rory: Its good. Hope you like remashed potatoes.
Lorelai: You can eat them with a straw.
Rory: Where are you two headed?
Logan: I need the other tongs. They're buried somewhere in the garage, and Luke is going to help me find them.
Luke: Right. We'll be right back
Logan: Clawed things out there. They went peacefully (kisses Rory)
Rory: Thank you. (to Lorelai) Its weird, you know?
Lorelai: Whats weird?
Rory: I don't know, it just hit me. These could be the ones.
Lorelai: The ones?
Rory: THE ones, you know?
Lorelai: Yeah....(more emphatically) yeah.


Rory, Logan, Luke and Lorelai are at a table on the deck)
Rory: Luke, werent you a lobster neophyte? Looks like you liked it.
Luke: Its good. I can't believe I've never had it before. (to Logan) You cooked them perfect.
Lorelai: Here, here. (they applaud Logan)
Logan: Thanks very much, you're too kind.
Lorelai: And not that I'm hunting for my own compliment, but that celery I cut, huh?
Rory: Let's hear it for the celery chopper
(they applaud Lorelai)
Lorelai: Oh, this is so spontaneous and unexpected, not quite loud enough. Thank you, thank you
Rory: So, should we clear?
Logan: Hey, its so pretty out here, sun will be down soon, so before it gets dark...( hands Rory a box) Happy Valentine's Day.
Rory: Oh, my God, you humanely killed lobsters, and you got me a present?
Logan: I'm a multi-tasker.
Rory: Hmm... (gasps) Its a bracelet.
Luke: Its a tennis bracelet.
Lorelai: You know what a tennis bracelet is?
Luke: Well, my sister makes jewelry, so I've picked up some terms.
Rory: Wow, I love it. Happy Valentine's Day.
Logan: Right back at ya, Ace.
(they kiss)
Luke: Well, I guess its my turn. (hands Lorelai a box) Happy Valentine's Day.
Lorelai: Really?
Luke: Really.
Lorelai: (gasps) Oh my God. Luke, its beautiful.
Luke: Good. Good, its going to look great on you.
Lorelai: (to Rory) Look at this.
Rory: Its you. And it goes well with mine.
Lorelai: Oh yeah, their almost matching.
Logan: Yeah, Luke and I actually sneaked out when you two were playing around in the kitchen, and we found those in the same place.
Luke: Yup, same shop.
Lorelai: I cant believe you got me a Valentine's Day gift.
Rory: Is it getting kind of cold?
Logan: Yeah, lets go in. We can clear all this later. Lets just build a fire and get warm.
Rory: Excellent

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

(Mitchum storms into Lorelai & Luke's room)
Mitchum: Who are you?
Luke: Who are you?
Mitchum: Mitchum Huntzberger, who are you?
Lorelai: Im Lorelai. Im Rory's mother.
Mitchum: Im looking for my son.
(Logan and Rory enter downstairs.)
Logan: Dad!
Mitchum: Where the hell have you been?
Logan: What are you doing here?
Mitchum: You turn off your cell, you turn off your pager. I told you never turn off your pager.
Logan: I got your pages.
Mitchum: So you're ignoring them? Thats great.
Logan: We're going to have it out in public?
(Rory looks on upset)
Mitchum: We're not in public, Logan, we're in my house. Yeah, we're going to have it out here.
Logan: You didnt need me this weekend.
Mitchum: You dont get to decide whether you're needed or not. I decide that, do you hear me? (Luke and Lorelai walk in)
Logan: They heard you in Nantucket!
Mitchum: You were not to be here! You were supposed to be on a red eye to London last night!
(They start yelling simultaneously)
Logan: How many times do I have to go to London?
Mitchum: I had a room full of colleagues...
Logan: I met all of them!
Mitchum: Some of them actually come from different bureaus to meet you!
Logan: I met them, too, for Gods sake!
Mitchum: And you blow it off to be with your little girlfriend! You embarass me! You embarass me...
Logan: You want to talk about embarassment, screw you!
Mitchum: ...and you embarass yourself. You listen to me. You listen to me. You are getting on a plane to London, you're getting on a plane to London, today.
Logan: Dad!
Mitchum: And you're going to explain to my colleagues why you wasted their Saturday, and robbed them of their Sunday. And let me tell you this, you better start acclimating yourself. Because you're in London for at least a year, starting the day after you graduate, as we discussed.
Logan: You discussed it.
Mitchum: You're doing this, Logan. And I'm driving you to the airport, myself. Right now, get packed! You've got ten minutes.
Logan: I have guests.
Mitchum: Your guests can stay. You're leaving!
(Mitchum storms out)
Logan: Excuse me.

(Lorelai and Luke walks towards the door with their bags, where Logan is standing)
Lorelai: Hey, still here?
Logan: Yeah. Just waiting for Rory to get her things.
Luke: You, uh, need any help there?
Logan: No. Thanks, Luke.
Luke: No problem. (to Lorelai) I just have to get that last bag.
Logan: Im really, really sorry about this.
Lorelai: Oh hey, its okay. It was fun while it lasted. No one understands letting the family down better than I do.
Rory: Hi.
Lorelai: Hi
Rory: (to Logan) Walk you out?
Logan: Yeah.
(they walk outside and see Mitchum's car and a driver waiting)
Rory: Intimidating. So...a full year in London?
Logan: Yup.
Rory: So when do you move, exactly? The Asia thing....I guess thats on the backburner. (Logan sighs) Do you have to leave the very after day you graduate, or...is there a cushion?
Logan: Stop. Its not happening. Okay? Not yet. Its February, we dont have to think about this right now. Right now it doesnt even exist. Okay? Im not gonna think about it, lets not think about it.
Rory: Okay.
Logan: Take the porsche home, and keep planning Asia.
Rory: You've got all my books with you.
(kisses her cheek, and walks to his father's car, as Lorelai walks towards Rory.)
Lorelai: So, thats Mitchum, huh? Just like I imagined him.