6.12 Like Gavin and Gwen

[Rory walks up the doors to her apartment, and sees flowers sitting outside the door. She sighs, picks them up, and walks inside, where they are dozens of other flowers already sitting]
Paris: Oh, terrific. Bring them on in, Algernon. The more the merrier.
Rory: Its Logan's doing. What can I do?
Paris: Tell him to stop.
Rory: We're not speaking, remember.
Paris: Well, they're putting our lives in jeopardy.
Rory: Oh, stop it.
Paris: They scream bling. Draw eyes to the apartment. Bad guys see roses, then come for our diamonds.
Rory: We dont have diamonds.
Paris: The doo wopp group doesnt know that. [Rory goes to put them on the window sill] Yeah! By the window's good, next to the neon sign that says 'Come pistol whip us'.
Rory: Fine, Ill hide them.
Paris: Ya know. I see Logan at the paper, a few times a week. I can lean on him. Make him stop.
Rory: He's going to get the message eventually.
Paris: Well, he better get it quick. Between the paper and classes, Im only home a few hours a day, and Id rather not spend them in mortal fear.
[the door knocks, and Paris jumps against the wall]
Rory: Paris!
Paris: YEAH?
UPS Guy: UPS. I got a package for Rory Gilmore.
Paris: From?
UPS Guy: Harry and David.
Paris: Great, scented fruit.
Rory: Sorry.
Paris: Step back from the door, and keep your hands where I can see them.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

[Rory is leaving the Yale Daily News when she runs into a coffee cart]
Rory: Excuse me.
Ben: You're Rory Gilmore?
Rory: Yes.
Ben: Someone pointed you out to me. This is for you.
Rory: What is?
Ben: The coffee cart.
Rory: It is? For me?
Ben: Courtesy of Logan Huntzberger.
Rory: Oh, I see. Well, I dont want any coffee. Thanks anyway and sorry, you wasted your time, Ben. [she walks away]
Ben: No problem [he follows her]
Rory: What are you doing?
Ben: Im hired for the day
Rory: What?
Ben: Yup. All day. Anytime you want some coffee, biscotti, I will be here.
Rory: Thats not necessary.
Ben: Ive already been paid. Alot
Rory: [sighs] Fine.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

[Lorelai walks into the living room of the Dragonfly, and sees Logan sitting there].
Logan: Hi.
Lorelai: Hello.
Logan: I was going to call you, but then I figured you wouldnt take the call.
Lorelai: Yeah, you figured right.
Logan: I just need a minute.
Lorelai: I cant fathom what a minute of my time is going to do for you.
Logan: Just a minute, please, and then I am gone.
Lorelai: Okay.
Logan: Look, I know I am not your favorite person in the world.
Lorelai: No, you are definitely low on the list. Right above that guy who thought up small pox blankets.
Logan: Well, in my defense, I think Im a notch or two above that.
Lorelai: You're not exactly in a position to comment on that, are you?
Logan: No.
Lorelai: No. In fact, lets take inventory of all the delightful things that have happened since you waltzed into my daughter's life. She was arrested, convicted, she's on probation, she'll have a criminal record unless we can get it expunged. She dropped out of school, moved out of my house, she didnt speak to me for 5 months, 3 weeks, and 16 days. Wait a minute, come to think of it, you are my favorite person!
Logan: Okay, I can defend myself on one or two of those points, as well.
Lorelai: No, you cant. Why are you here?
Logan: I miss her, okay. I made a mistake, and Im trying to rectify it, but nothing is working. She wont talk to me.
Lorelai: Can you blame her?
Logan: No. Im doing everything I can. Flowers, gifts...
Lorelai: All your old stand-bys, huh?
Logan: Books, coffee cart...Im trying to show her how I feel.
Lorelai: And it sounds like she's trying to show you how she feels.
Logan: Look, I figured this was a suicide mission, okay. Its probably something you and Rory will laugh about for years to come. But Im not giving up until I exhaust all my options, and asking for your help is one of them.
Lorelai: Really?
Logan: Yes.
Lorelai: You're seriously here to ask for my help with Rory? Its not a joke?
Logan: Im going for broke, here.
Lorelai: Well...you've got moxie, my friend. I'll give you that.
Logan: I think I get it from my dad.
Lorelai: I hate your dad.
Logan: Me too. See, we have things in common, you and me. Maybe this isnt so crazy.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

[Rory walks up to her apartment, where Logan is standing with a box of donuts]
Logan: I come bearing gifts.
Rory: I have to unlock the door.
Logan: You cant say no to these, I know you. Its biologically impossible.
Rory: Oh yeah? [looks] No.
Logan: That seems very cumbersome.
Rory: You get used to it.
Logan: Did you get the coffee cart?
Rory: Do you really think we're going to chit chat?
Logan: I just wanted to know.
Rory: Yes, I got it. And the flowers, and the books, and the candles, and the fruit, whats next on the list? A marching band, a parrot who says Im sorry? You have to go.
Logan: Wait. [pulls out an envelope]
Rory: Whats that, a subpoena?
Logan: Its a note from your mother.
Rory: You're kidding.
Logan: Check out the handwriting, Dragonfly stationary. Can we get out of the hallway? [they go inside] I went to see her at her Inn. We talked a little, it was a tad humiliating. She told me to wait, and she came back with this. She said to give it to you.
Rory: What does it say?
Logan: I was instructed not to read it. She even signed the seal on the envelope to make sure.
Rory: You have no idea what this says?
Logan: None. [she opens the letter, and starts reading] Whats it say?
Rory: Shh. [keeps reading and smiles]
Logan: Whats it say?
Rory: Shh. [keeps reading and laughs]
Logan: What does it say?
Rory: Shh.
Logan: Come on, Ace. You're laughing. Is that good or bad?
Rory: [nods as she reads] Hmmm. Yup...yup...[laughs]
Logan: Just give me some indication of whether its good or bad...something, anything. Okay, fine. Just tell me, is there anything in there about giving me a second chance?
Rory: I have to reread it.
Logan: Please dont do that. Ace, come on, just come out with me. Let me make it up to you.
Rory: Maybe dinner.
Logan: When?
Rory: Ill have to check my schedule.
Logan: So check it.
Rory: I cant do it right now!
Logan: So....
Rory: Ill call you.
Logan: Good enough, good enough, you promise you'll call.
Rory: Leave the donuts.

6.11 The Perfect Dress

[Rory is running down a corridor at Yale
Rory: Professor Jeline! Professor Jeline!
Prof. Jeline: I'm sorry, I'm in a bit of a hurry.
Rory: That's okay. Don't slow down. I'll catch up. Hi. Rory Gilmore.
Prof. Jeline: Nice to meet you, Rory.
Rory: And you. Really. I'm actually hoping to get a spot in your class. It was full by the time I got my name in. Not that my delay in registering should be taken as lack as enthusiasm....
Prof. Jeline: Apparently not.
Rory: So anyhow, I'm really hoping to score a spot in your class.
Prof. Jeline: Well, add/drop begins tomorrow.
Rory: I am aware of that. I just though I would start putting a good word in for myself right now. So here's the good word. I am dying to be in your class. I even bought your book, see? The one you wrote for the class, and I bought it new, not used, so that you get full royalty payment on it.
Prof. Jeline: Well, thank you.
Rory: I want to be in your class.
Prof. Jeline: I can't make you any promises, but I appreciate your enthusiasm. And by the way, I get full royalties whether you buy the book new or used.
Rory: See how much I've learned already.
Prof. Jeline: Good-bye, Rory.
Rory: I will see you tomorrow.
[Rory turns and heads toward the coffee cart. Logan is sitting on a bench by the cart. He looks at her and smiles as he stand up.]
Logan: I knew you'd have to hit the coffee cart eventually.
[Rory looks at him, then turns and walks away, leaving a slightly surprised Logan looking after her.]

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

[Paris has just ended a meeting at the Yale Daily News, she is talking to Rory, as she sees Logan walk up]
Paris: Oh, great. I got a call saying your boyfriend was coming back.
Rory: He's not my boyfriend anymore, Paris. We broke up.
Paris: Hey, keep your personal stuff at home, okay. I cant be seen caring about this stuff. My door's not open! Huntzberger, my office, now!
[He follows Paris, tapping Rory on the arm, she walks away]
Paris: Sit down, Logan. Lets have a little talk about your future.
Logan: Sure, Paris.
Paris: Now, I know you think your Sugar Daddy runs the world, and that includes this paper. And possibly in the past, that was true. But not anymore. You dont scare me, your daddy doesnt scare me...[he leans his chair back, looking towards Rory's desk, to find her gone]...your mommy doesnt scare me, if you have a brother, a sister, or a really angry cat, they dont scare me, either. Hey! Either spin a plate on your nose while you do that, or cut it out, because I am speaking.
Logan: Sorry.
Paris: Oh, you will be. Now, lets talk about deadlines. Emphasis on dead.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

[Rory walks up the stairs to her apartment, to find Logan waiting for her.]
Logan: I brought coffee, but its cold.
[she puts down her books, to unlock the door]
Logan: Nice place you've got here. Ive been discussing the proper baking soda to actual crack ratio you can get away with, with your neighbors downstairs. 2 to 1 during the daylight, 3 to 1 at night.
Rory: I have ten minutes to change, then I have some place I have to be.
Logan: Its going to take you twenty to unlock the door.
Rory: Bye, Logan.
Logan: This place is a dump, Rory. You cant live here.
Rory: You dont get to care about where I live anymore, Logan. You broke up with me. Through your sister!
Logan: I didnt mean for that to happen.
Rory: You're a coward! Mr. Life and Death Brigade cant even break up with his girlfriend!
Logan: Honor was bugging me. I just told her we broke up to shut her up. I needed some time.
Rory: So, you didnt mean it?
Logan: No, I did...I just. [sighs] It was too much for me, okay?
Rory: It was a fight. People fight.
Logan: Yeah, well I dont fight. I dont want to be screaming at you in a bar. I cant take that, its too much drama.
Rory: Well, if you cant take the "drama", then you shouldnt even be in a relationship. Which, by the way, you're not, so everythings good.
Logan: Its not that easy.
Rory: Sure it is.
Logan: [sighs as Rory fights with the door] Want some help?
Rory: Nope.
Logan: I bet one of those guys downstairs can help you out with getting into a locked apartment.
Rory: [opens the door] Just go be you somewhere else, Logan.
Logan: I thought I wanted to break up. I thought it was a stupid experiment, me trying to be a boyfriend. That it didn't work and I would just move on. And I didn't. Couldn't actually.
[Rory gets the door open. She turns to pick up all her dropped stuff.]
Logan: Rory! I love you.
Rory: I have an appointment. I have to go.
[Rory goes inside and slams the door behind her. Logan stands there defeated.]

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

[Rory walks into Dr. Shapiro's office]
Rory: Sorry I'm late.
Dr. Shapiro: Well, considering how many times you rescheduled I'm just happy you're here at all.
Rory: Well, I was just spending time with my mother. We were apart for a while so...
Dr. Shapiro: You were?
Rory: Yeah.
Dr. Shapiro: Falling out?
Rory: Nothing major, just mother-daughter stuff. [she goes over and sits on the couch.] I don't have to lie down, do I?
Dr Shapiro: Nope. That's not a lying down couch.
Rory: Good.
Dr. Shapiro: So you were talking about your mother. A falling out with your mother.
Rory: Yeah. But we're fine.
Dr. Shapiro: Did this falling out have anything to do with you dropping out of school?
Rory: Boy, we just jumped right into this didn't we?
Dr. Shapiro: You want to talk about something else first?
Rory: No.
Dr. Shapiro: I mean, we're here to talk about your leaving school so I figured let's just start there. What happened?
Rory: Nothing. We fought. I'm fine. We're fine.
Dr Shapiro: I hear you had some legal problems.
Rory: My those are big ears you have there Grandma.
Dr. Shapiro: Stealing a boat is a pretty big deal.
Rory: I was upset.
Dr. Shapiro: About what?
Rory: About life. And things and stuff.
Dr. Shapiro: You spent a night in jail.
Rory: Yes, I did.
Dr. Shapiro: How did that feel?
Rory: Great
Dr. Shapiro: You don't want to talk about this either?
Rory: I'm just sick of talking about it that's all.
Dr. Shapiro: You seem very agitated.
Rory: I'm not agitated. I mean, so I spent a night in jail, big deal. So did Martin Luther King.
Dr. Shapiro: Are you comparing yourself with Martin Luther King?
Rory: No. I'm not. I'm just saying he spent a night in jail, too.
Dr. Shapiro: You were arrested with your boyfriend.
Rory: Yes, I was.
Dr. Shapiro: Tell me about that.
Rory: About what? he was just my boyfriend then and now he's not.
Dr.Shaprio: He's not.
Rory: No, he's not. We broke up. Oh no, I'm sorry, he broke up. I thought we were just taking some time but apparently I'm a moron.
Dr. Shapiro: This is Logan?
Rory: Oh, you have his name, too? Super! Do you also have the picture of him hijacking me in my hallway earlier today?
Dr. Shapiro: I'm sorry, what?
Rory: I mean how fair is that? He's gone and then he shows up out of the blue, 'you can't live here it's a dump. And by the way I love you!' I love you? Is he serious?
Dr. Shapiro: I don't know.
Rory: [crying] Nothing for weeks, and then he decides he loves me? So what happens now? I get another Birkin bag? And how long until he doesn't love me again, huh?
[Dr. Shapiro picks up the kleenex box and holds it out to her. Rory takes a bunch of tissues.]
Rory: I stole a boat with him! I never stole a boat with Dean!
Dr. Shapiro: Who's Dean?
Rory: My married ex-boyfriend who I lost my virginity to!
Dr. Shapiro: Wow.
Rory: Yeah! I'm a treat! I don't know what Im going to do. I don't think I can take it, running into him every day in the halls, at the paper...the coffee cart! Oh my god, I'm going to have to stop drinking coffee! And I love coffee! [Rory grabs another handful of kleenex.] I really love coffee!!

6.08 Let Me Hear Your Balalaikas Ringing Out

[Logan is walking through the Yale campus, on the phone with Rory]
Rory: You really get like no notice on these things do you?
Logan: None. Its always 'grab your bags, and meet me on the tarmac in an hour, son, over and out'. Its always an ungodly hour.
Rory: 6am?
Logan: Thats my bedtime for Godsake.
Rory: So where is he dragging you this time?
Logan: A paper in Omaha. What state is that in again?
Rory: Nebraska.
Logan: Uh...corn, farm animals...football?
Rory: Oh, and they love condescention in Nebraska, too, so hit them with that as soon as you disembark.
Logan: Well, you have got to be free tonight, my dear. 'Cuz I am getting the group together for a blow out. Do not tell me your working.
Rory: I can make some time for you. (sees Emily) Oops...evasive manuever.
Logan: What?
Rory: My grandmother.
Logan: She coming at you with a knife or something?
Rory: Its one thing to be forced to live in the big house, but now the big house is feeling Tom Thumb tiny. My grandmother is everywhere.
Logan: The older generation. They have their own methods of ubiquity.
Rory: Im positive that there are at least five of her wandering around the property like shes a Cylon.
Logan: [whhispers] So, you can meet me out here tonight.
Rory: [whispers] Why are you whispering?
Logan: [whispers] Because your whispering.
Rory: Thats cute. So, Ill see you at your place? Eight o'clock?
Logan: Perfect.
Rory: See you then.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

[Rory, Logan, and the gang are at a pub - A folksinger is performing]
Finn: Met her
Colin: Cool, a girl on girl thing. Its a snuff film.
Finn: A lesbian snuff film.
Colin: A redundant lesbian snuff film. How INXS missed her, I dont know.
Logan: Raise a glass to INXS.
Finn: My countrymen, Im less than proud to say...
Colin: I cannot CANNOT believe theyve reinstated folk night at my beloved pub.
Finn: Its a travesty!
Juliet: Is there any alcohol left in the state of Connecticut thats not inside them?
Rosemary: I doubt it.
Logan: So, boys...another round?
Colin: Post haste! Barkeep!
Rory: You've hardly touched the drink in front of you.
Logan: Ah, but Im anticipating. You dont wait until the drinks done to order another, thats for amateurs.
Rory: Right. I forgot you went pro
Logan: So, boys, boys. When is the Life and Death Brigade going out again? We've been remiss.
Colin: I have ideas. Big ideas, potentially harmful ideas.
Guy: Hey, you mind?
Colin: Boyfriend?
Finn: Brother?
Colin: Or both? He could be Southern?
Logan: Hey, new drinking game! Every time the folk singer sounds sincere, we have to take a drink.
Juliet: Buckle your seat belt. It's going to be a long night.
Finn: Come on, start folding your own, gents. Whoever hits the folk singer first, wins.


[The streets are quiet as Rory and the group exit the pub patio. The guys are staggering. Colin and Finn head to Rory's car, which is parked across the street. Rory walks with Logan, who is so drunk he needs help walking]
Finn: Good Morning, New Haven!!! My, my you look fresh and appealing tonight!!!!
Man: SHUT UP!!
Finn: God has spoken to me, rather rudely!
Man: Shut up!!
Rory: Finn, keep it down.
Colin: Finn watch!! TOSTINGO!!!
[Finn immatates a machine gun]
Logan: Why are we leaving, Ace?
Rory: Because theyre closing.
Logan: Thats no excuse.
Rory: We've overstayed our welcome.
Logan: That makes me sad.
Rory: You've go to catch your plane in the morning.
Juliet: Have I gained weight?
Rosemary: Why?
Juliet: Finn didnt make a pass at me.
Finn: No, love, my brain is cloudy. Here I am making a pass at you. Pass! Pass!
Colin: Thats so expositional.
Rory: Guys, just get in the car.
Colin: [pause] Ive forgotten how to get into a car.
Finn: Me, too. Rory, do you have your owners manual with you, love.
Rory: Oh, my God, just get in!
Juliet: Wow, bon voyage.
Rosemary: Good luck with your rangling!!
Logan: One more drink.
Colin: OH, WE'VE GOT A RUNNER!!!
Rory: Logan!!
Logan: Hey, come on, let me in.
Rory: Logan, Theyre closed.
Logan: I have to apologize to that folk singer.
Rory: Shes not here, everyone is gone.
Logan: I hurt her feelings.
Rory: Shes a folk singer, shes used to it, come on.
Logan: I dont want to go to Omaha tomorrow.
Rory: I know.
Logan: Its boring.
Rory: I know.
Logan: And its not here.
Rory: Come on.
Logan: I dont like steaks, or insurance or football, or anything else that they have there.
Rory: You like steaks.
Logan: Do they even have electricity there?
Rory: Yeah. Yeah, they just got it last year.
Logan: Dont make me go.
Rory: Im not making you go, Im just trying to get you home.
Logan: But bringing me home, means that I have to go to sleep, then when I wake up I have to go on a plane to Omaha. Wheres Omaha? Wheres Omaha?
Rory: Just get in. Colin! Finn!!! Guys!!!

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

[Rory comes out the front door, as Jess is throwing stones at the house]
Rory: What are you doing?
Jess: I didnt know if it was okay to ring or not.
Rory: Shes not here.
Jess: Shes not?!?!
Rory: Shes playing bridge tonight
Jess: Good. I parked on the street so she wouldnt see.
Rory: Youre very good at covert ops.
Jess: Years of practice. So, where do you want to go?
Rory: I dont know. I dont the area that well.
Jess: You live here.
Rory: I know, but Hartford is still a mystery. Even when I went to Chilton, I got right on the bus and headed home, so I dont even have any old high school hangouts to revisit, and these days Ive just been eating here.
Jess: Well, I would prefer not going somewhere that has the word food in the title.
Rory: Meaning?
Jess: Olive, Cheese, Soup, no Gardens, no plantations.
Rory: I got it. Somewhere funky.
Jess: Just steer me to the college district, I'll find us something funky.
Rory: Sounds good
[Logan drives up]
Rory: Logan!
Logan: Am I interrupting something?
Rory: No. Hey, when did you get back?
Logan: A couple of hours ago.
Rory: Oh, I thought you werent getting back until tomorrow.
Logan: I thought I'd surprise you, Ace.
Rory: Well, Im glad you did, because now you get to meet my old friend. Jess, this is Logan, my boyfriend. Logan, this is Jess, he's in from
out of town. [silence - as Logan and Jess size each other up] Wow, that sounded so grown up. We're at the age now where we say things like 'in from out of town' and 'old friend' cuz when you're young, all your friends are new. You have to get old to have old friends.
Logan: How ya doing?
Jess: Okay.
Rory: We were just gonna go grab a bite to eat.
Logan: What if we all go together, is that okay?
Jess: Okay by me.
Logan: Good.
Rory: Alright, good. We were actually lost on somewhere to go, so you saved us.
Logan: Call me Superman. [to Jess] Why dont you follow us?
Jess: Great.
[Logan leads Rory to his car]

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Logan: I live pretty close. I'd have you over to check it out, but its a bit of a mess.
Rory: And you dont serve food, so we would have been starving at your place.
Logan: I've got appetizers. Full bags of chips. Just check the expiration date before you dive in.
Jess: Im good with this place.
Logan: Little pointer. Dont come on folk night.
Jess: Yeah, Im not a big fan of folk music.
Logan: Something we have in comon.
Jess: Great.
Logan: Where is the waitress? Yo! Yo, right here. Another McKellan's Neat, and Jess, another brew?
Jess: I'm still working on this one.
Logan: Another one, just in case.
Rory: We should probably order. [to Jess] Its a big menu, so if you need guidance...
Jess: Im not hungry.
Logan: You're not hungry?
Jess: Nope.
Logan: I thought the whole point was that you two were gonna get something to eat.
Rory: And talk.
Logan: Well, yes, its a given that you're gonna talk while you eat, you know the chef de cuisine will gladly make any meal you want, if nothing there appeals.
Rory: The burgers are good here.
Jess: Maybe a burger.
Logan: Get one of those fancy ones too, and the meal is on me, so don't let the price stop you.
Jess: Ill pay for my own.
Logan: Good man. So, how long have you two known each other?
Jess: A while.
Logan: Did you date?
Rory: Yes, we used to date.
Logan: Ah...no hemming, no hawing, a good course of action. So, were you two high school sweethearts, rock around the clock, two straws and a milkshake?
Rory: Logan!
Logan: Hey, did we do cheers? I dont think we cheered, thats bad luck. Let's cheers.
Jess: I think we did already, twice.
Logan: Well, let's do it again. [raises his glass] Cheers. So, what do you do, Jess?
Jess: Oh, this and that.
Logan: Describe the this. Describe the that.
Rory: He writes.
Logan: You write? Impressive! What do you write?
Jess: Nothing important.
Rory: He wrote a book.
Logan: Oh! Did you pen the Great American Novel, Jess?
Jess: Wasn't quite that ambitious.
Logan: So what are we talking here, short novel? Kafka-length, or longer? Dos Pasos? Tolstoy, or longer? Robert Musil? Prust? Im not throwing you with these names, am I?
Jess: You seem very obsessed with length
Logan: I'm just trying to get a picture in my head, thats all.
Rory: Its a short novel.
Logan: Any good?
Rory: I haven't read it yet.
Logan: Yet? Well, At least you'll have one reader, thats something.
Jess: Yeah.
Logan: You know, I should just write down all my random thoughts, the stuff that happens to me, and conversations I have, and just add a bunch of he said she saids, and get it published. You gotta copy on you?
Jess: No.
Logan: You should send me a copy.
Jess: Sure, where do I send it? To the blonde dick at Yale?
Rory: Jess.
Logan: Woah, waoh, we're just trying to keep it friendly here, buddy. [Rory and Jess get up to leave]
Jess: Get out of my way.
Logan: Forget him, Rory.
Rory: Dont follow me.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Logan: You're not gonna believe this. Over the music, the crowd, I hear one girl's voice cutting through it all. The folk singer, she's in the corner with her boyfriend. I sent them a round of drinks. What the hell? Is he gone?
Rory: Yes, hes gone.
Logan: Writers. They're so sensitive.
Rory: You were a jerk, Logan.
Logan: I was just challenging him. Geez. Hey, if Hemmingway can take it, so can he. Hey, if he wanted, he could have taken a pop at me. Pugnacity! Its a vital component of literary life. Again, consult your Hemmingway. Come on, do not let this guy get to you.
Rory: You're getting to me!
Logan: Me?
Rory: Yes. You were an ass.
Logan: Look, I'm sorry I came back early. I really messed things up here.
Rory: Jess wrote a book! He wrote a book, and you mocked him.
Logan: I did not mock him.
Rory: He's doing something.
Logan: Good. Fine, he's doing something, everybody in the world is doing something, more power to him.
Rory: I'm not. I mean, what am I doing? I'm living with my grandparents.
Logan: Thats temporary. Have a drink.
Rory: Temporary can turn into forever.
Logan: [seriously] You're not living with the Gilmore's forever.
Rory: I'm palling with my grandmother, I'm being waited on by a maid, I come home, and my shoes are magically shined, my clothes are magically cleaned, ironed, and laid out. My bed is magically turned down. I'm in the DAR? I'm going to meetings, and teas, and cocktail parties?
Logan: Again, temporary. Have a drink.
Rory: I'm wasting my time, partying and drinking. Just hanging out, doing nothing.
Logan: Woah, woah, woah....dont pull me into this.
Rory: I didn't say anything about you.
Logan: Yes, you did. Don't make me feel guilty for your drinking and partying. Thats your choice, I'm not forcing you. When I ask you out, you can say no.
Rory: Its all we do.
Logan: Its not all we do!
Rory: Its all you do.
Logan: Well, my perrogative, you know? Your damn straight, I'm gonna party, and I'm going to do it while I have the chance, because come June, my life is over!!!
Rory: OHHH....yes, your horrible life. Lets hear about it.
Logan: Gotta week?
Rory: You have every door opened to you. You have opportunities that anyone would kill for, including me.
Logan: No one is stopping you from making whatever you want happen. Go into journalism, go into politics, be a doctor, be a clown, do whatever you want!
Rory: Its not as easy when its not handed to you!
Logan: Really? Its all so easy for me? I dont want that life!! Its forced on me! You talk about all these doors being opened? All I is see one door, and Im being pushed through it! I have no choice!!! You try living without options!
Rory: How hard are you fighting it?!?
Logan: I didnt tell you to quit Yale, you did that! I gave you one month, you went beyond that month, it had nothing to do with me. It was all you! Now, you want to change, change it. But dont blame me, dont you dare blame me!!! You know what? Why dont you go off with Jay...Jack, whatever his name is.
Rory: Oh, I'm not going off with Jess!!
Logan: [sighs] Come on.
Rory: Where?
Logan: Go. Lets go, I dont want to be here.
Rory: I dont want to go.
Logan: Well, I drove, and I want to go.
Rory: I dont want to go!
Logan: Fine. I'll cover the bill, the cab, do whatever you want. Its your choice.

6.07 21 is the Loneliest Number

[Rory and Logan are on the couch in the pool-house, kissing]
Rory: What time is our reservation?
Logan: Now.
Rory: Oh. Its amazing what happens when you can't find your keys.
Logan: I think we should order in tonight.
Rory: And the purse is down. [hears a knock at the door] Who is it?
Emily: Emily Gilmore. I am so sorry to bother you, Rory. Hello, Logan. Logan: Hello, Emily.
Emily: Rory, can you check your closet, the maid hung up your dry cleaning today, and I am missing a blouse, and I want to know whether or not to add this to the list of reasons why Im firing her.
Rory: Of course. I'll be right back. (goes to her room)
Emily: Thank you, Rory. I'm so exhausted with incompetent people, I dont know what to do anymore. I feel like every person I hire gets immediately hit in the head with a mallet on their way out of the employment office. (grabs Logans arm) Logan, do you have anything special planned for Rory's birthday, next week?
Logan: Uh, no. No plans.
Emily: Oh, good. Because I would love to throw her a party here. A 21st birthday is so special. But I didn't want to order 12 pounds of crab legs if you had plans to whisk her off to San Tirini.
Logan: No whisking plans in the works.
Rory: Sorry, Grandma. Your blouse isn't in there.
Emily: Say, Rory. How would you like a birthday party next week?
Rory: Oh, well...
Emily: It doesn't have to be a big formal affair. Just something fun, with a few of your friends, and the DAR ladies, whoever you want.
Rory: Sure, Grandma. A party sounds fne.
Emily: I'll go right in and call the caterers. 21 years old, time flies, doesn't it? Alright you two, back to what you were doing.
Rory: Hey, Grandma says.
Logan: So, a 21st birthday, big event.
Rory: I guess.
Logan: Would have been nice if I'd known about.
Rory: Oh, I didn't tell you.
Logan: NO.
Rory: Oh, I'm just not into birthdays.
Logan: You're not into birthdays? You, who wore green head to toe on St. Patricks Day, and Bunny ears on Easter.
Rory: I have stock in Hallmark
Logan: What's up, Ace.
Rory: We should probably call the restaurant if we still want to eat there.
Logan: Ace!
Rory: Im just not excited about this particular birthday.
Logan: Why not?
Rory: Because Im turning 21.
Logan: Yes?
Rory: My mom and I have been planning for my 21st birthday since...well, my first memory is Kindergarten, but I have a feeling she was talking about it before then. We had this whole big thing planned.
Logan: Yeah
Rory: We were going to go to Atlantic City, and sit at a blackjack table at 11:59, and we'd be playing 21, when I turned 21. And we were gonna drink martinis, and win money, and go buy 21 things, and there was this thing including 21 guys, that would be totally inappropriate now that I'm with you, but it was a pretty big thing, and now we're not talking, so...its not gonna happen. I'm just a little bummed, thats all.
Logan: I know you miss your mom. The concept is a little hard for me to grasp, but I know you do.
Rory: Well, you never got to know her. But she can be...pretty cool.
Logan: Hey, I know. I'll take you to Atlantic City.
Rory: What?
Logan: We can still play 21 when you turn 21, we can buy the 21 things. Id still vote to put the kabash on the thing with the 21 guys, but other than that, I'm good to go.
Rory: That's sweet, but its okay.
Logan: Come on, we'll get a car, 21 cars if you like.
Rory: No. No, I appreciate the offer, alot. But, I'll just have the party, and let this birthday pass.
Logan: You're sure?
Rory: Yeah, yeah, I'm sure. And I'm hungry, so lets go. Where did I put my keys?
Logan: Oh, I think I saw them on the couch.
Rory: Here we go again. [smiles as they pick up where they left off]

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

[Logans car pulls up outside the mansion]
Logan: Out.
Rory: Oh, come on!
Logan: Beat it.
Rory: I can't believe you're not gonna come in.
Logan: I told you, I'm meeting my father at 7:30 in the morning, in New York.
Rory: I loved dinner tonight
Logan: I'm glad.
Rory: I've never had Sri Lankan food before
Logan: I thought you'd like it.
Rory: And I appreciate your lying to me, and answering chicken, every time I asked you what I was eating.
Logan: 15 courses, one of them was bound to be chicken.
Rory: And that dessert...
Logan: Do you really think you can keep talking long enough that I forget that I cant come in?
Rory: Well, I've seen my mom do it before, I thought maybe it was a family trait. [he kisses her] Just for an hour.
Logan: No.
Rory: Half an hour?
Logan: No.
Rory: Fifteen minutes?
Logan: No.
Rory: Ok, an hour.
Logan: You're getting better at this.
[they start kissing again, and there is a knock on the window]
Rory: Ouch, you bit my lip.
Richard: I didn't mean to startle you two, I just heard a noise out here, and came to check it out.
Logan: Everything's fine, Richard. I was just dropping Rory off.
Rory: Hi, Grandpa.
Richard: Hello, Rory. Well, I'll just say goodnight then.
Rory: Goodnight, Grandpa.
Logan: Goodnight, Richard.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Logan: Well, there they are, the two most lovely ladies in the room.
Emily: (coldly) Hello, Logan. (to Rory) I have to check on your cake.
Logan: Huh. Is it me or could the penguins march through here?
Rory: She's probably mad because she found out we're having sex.
Logan: She WHAT?!?!
Rory: She found out we're having sex.
Logan: How the hell did she find that out?
Rory: I told her minister.
Logan: But...but why would you do that?
Rory: Because he was going on and on about my virtue being a gift, and now you have it, so Im going to have to buy the next guy a sweater. And I just wanted him to stop.
Logan: And all this without a drink in my hand.
Rory: Come on, lets get you a Rory.
Logan. Ugh, dealing with this family is stressful.
Rory: Tell me about it. And once you've had that drink, I can tell you how I've been moved out of the poolhouse and into a room right next to my grandparents, so from now on we'll have to have sex in our invisible suits. [Logan groans] Two Rorys please.
Logan: Does your grandfather know also?
Rory: Oh yeah.
Logan: (to the bartender) Make it four.
Lane: Rory!!
Rory: You came!
Lane: Of course I came! I wouldn't miss your 21st birthday.
Rory: Oh, I'm glad. Hey, Zack. Thanks for coming.
Zack: Sure. There's food, right?
Rory: Oh, plenty of food. Lane, I want you to meet Logan. Logan, this is my best friend, Lane.
Logan: Hey, its nice to finally meet you.
Lane: Nice to finally meet you, too. (mouths to Rory 'he's cute!') And this is my boyfriend, Zack.
Logan: How ya doing?
Zack: What? Oh, I'm hanging in there.
Logan: You guys want a drink?
Zack: Well, I'm not sharing, so make it two drinks.
Lane: Wow, this house is amazing. I've never been here before.
Rory: I'll give you a tour.
Bartender: Two Rorys, extra cherries for the lady.
Lane: Oh my God, you have your own drink.
Rory: Wait until you see the bathroom. The guest soap has my face on it.
Zack: (to Logan): So, you're like rich...huh?

6.06 Welcome to the Dollhouse

[Logan walks into the poolhouse]
Rory: Wow, you made good time.
Logan: Silly, rabbit. Speed limits are for kids.
Rory: Hey, you went shopping?
Logan: [hold up shopping bag]Actually, I did.
Rory: For me?
Logan: For you.
Rory: Wow...whats the occassion?
Logan: Where is it written that I need an occassion?
Rory: [takes out box] Wow, you did it. You brought me the head of Alfredo Garcia!
Logan: Open it, Ace.
Rory: [pulls out an orange bag] Wow, cool, a bag!
Logan: Look inside.
Rory: [pulls out a pink Birken bag] Wow, Cool, a bag!
Logan: Do you like it?
Rory: Hello, Im a girl. Its a purse.
Logan: Its not just a purse, its a Birken bag.
Rory: I went to a school with a guy named Birken.
Logan: I dont think this is the same Birken.
Rory: Oh. Well, its beautiful. Its classy, and snazzy. Oh, and smell it, it has that great new car smell, except its not a car. Oh, I love it, Logan. I love it, thank you so much.
Logan: Well, your welcome. Sorry, there's not another bag inside the bag inside the bag, inside the box inside the bag.
Rory: You know, I think my computer chords will fit in this perfectly.
Logan: Uh...this is not a computer chord kind of purse, Ace. You know what, why don't you call my sister, she'll fill you in. Its like a thing, you know?
Rory: [smiles] Its a thing. Its a beautiful, leather, grown up thing.
Logan: You ready to go?
Rory: Uh, yeah. [takes her small purse and throws it in the Birken bag] Let's go.

***********************************************

Rory: I've never had so many compliments about anything.
Logan: Its not the bag, Ace. Its the arm its on.
Rory: And, I like, swear that I am not going to let ball point pens explode in the bottom of it.
Logan: Crap, I left my cell back in the car.
Rory: You expecting a call?
Logan: [sighs] From my dad. Hes dragging me to this Corporate retreat with his editors. Three days of 'absolutley, Mitchum' 'great idea, Mitchum' 'can i pretaste that food for you, mitchum?'
Rory: You can suffer for three days.
Logan: I'll meet you back at the poolhouse, okay.
Rory: Don't get lost.
Richard: Oh, Logan...I thought I heard a noise.
Logan: Richard, yes. I was just...dropping Rory off.
Richard: Ah, ten o'clock on the button, well done.
Logan: Well, I didn't want to keep her out too late, sir.
Richard: You're a responsible young man, Logan. Say, how about a nightcap? I have a new single malt I'm dying to break in.
Logan: Sounds great.
Richard: Right this way. [to Emliy] Look who I found.
Emily: Logan! You found Logan. How are you?
Logan: How are you, Emily?
Richard: Logan was just dropping Rory off.
Emily: Ten o'clock on the button.
Richard: A gentleman, this one.
Emily: Logan, would you like some coffee, perhaps some dessert?
Logan: Thanks, Emily, but I've eaten.
Richard: I thought the two of us might grab a little night cap.
Emily: Well, I'll leave you men to your drinks.
Logan: Good seeing you, Emily.
Richard: So, how are things, Logan?
Logan: Fine.
Richard: Good. Back at school, are you?
Logan: For a few weeks, now.
Richard: Good, good....its good thats your back. Got any classes that you're interested in this year?
Logan: The semester is shaping up okay. [hands Logan some scotch] Thank you.
Richard: Cheers. Are you working at the Yale paper again?
Logan: Yes, sir.
Richard: Apple doesn't fall from the tree, does it?
Logan: Not if the tree has anything to say about it.
Richard: Yes, well. Its good to see you. We don't get many sightings of you young people know a days. The two of you. Ensconced back there in the pool house. Rory's so busy. Her life is a total mystery to us. She could be in the CIA for all we know.
Logan: Well, I don't think she's joined the CIA, sir. But I'll check her purse for secret documents.
Richard: So, tell me, Logan. What is going on with Rory? Your's and Rory's life?
Logan: Ah, nothing special.
Richard: No? Oh. Well...does she have any big plans?
Logan: Plans?
Richard: Yes. Well, the way that girl keeps to herself, we wouldn't know if she was moving to Peru. Are you two planning on moving to Peru?
Logan: No, we're not.
Richard: Well, if not Peru, then what is on the horizon for Rory...and for you. Anything different gonna happen?
Logan: I don't...ah, well...we're thinking about going to the Vineyard in a few weeks. Thats about it.
Richard: A trip to the Vineyard? Nothing else coming down the pike?
Logan: No, sir.
Richard: Hmm. [Rory sees Logan through the window, and is confused] Well, the Vineyard is always nice. Very brisk, this time of year.
Rory: Hey, Logan. What are you doing here? I thought you left.
Logan: I ran into Richard on the way out.
Emily: [from upstairs] Rory? Is that you? [comes downstairs]
Rory: Yes, grandma. Its me.
Emily: What are you doing here?
Rory: Well...I was just looking for some sugar, for my morning coffee.
Emily: Oh, please dont get me started on sugar.
Logan: Richard and I were just catching up.
Richard: Having a little digestif.
Logan: Yes, and Richard, the scotch is great, but I should probably get going, given the hour.
Richard: Oh, yes, of course.
Rory: I'll walk you out.
Logan: Richard, Emily.
Richard: Good to see you, Logan.
Emily: Drive safe.

*******************************************

Rory: What was that all about?
Logan: What was that about? Your grandfather was asking about my intentions.
Rory: Your intentions? Toward what?
Logan: Uh, towards you, us...marriage.
Rory: What? Why?
Logan: I don't know. Suddenly I was in there, and he's asking me all kinds of questions about our plans and the future, and the CIA and Peru.
Rory: I don't understand. Why would he do this?
Logan: I don't know.
Rory: I'm only 20. We're young. We just started going out. Why would we even be thinking about marriage?
Logan: I don't know, Ace. These are all really good questions. Listen, maybe we should hang out at my place for awhile, so as not to give your grandparents a visual to latch onto.
Rory: No. Look I'll take care of this, I promise. Dont worry about it.
Logan: Ace, its okay. You dont have to do anything.
Rory: No, this is not okay. This is NOT cool. I don't want them thinking this, I don't want you thinking you cant come over here. I promise you, I will take care of this, okay?
Logan: Okay. Ugh!
Rory: What?
Logan: My cell phone is still in my car.
Rory: Oh, sorry.
Logan: Hey, if I'm not back in five minutes, it means I'm in the main house picking out china patterns with Emily.

************************************************** *

[Logan knocks on Rorys kitchen window]
Rory: Logan?
Logan: I don't think they saw me. Can you get this open?
Rory: Logan, its okay. You can use the front door.
Logan: No, this is cool. I got a tree stump I can use as a boost out here. Or...you can let down your hair.
Rory: I talked to them.
Logan: You did?
Rory: Yeah. Its fine. Come on in this way.
Logan: Okay.
Rory: You do know that I will be mocking you for a year, for trying to climb in my kitchen window.
Logan: I just can't face another sitdown.
Rory: No, it was a misunderstanding. I talked to my grandmother, and my grandfather. He was not trying to pressure you. He gets that were young, and just started dating, and he's not interested in our getting serious.
Logan: Really?
Rory: Yeah. He is very sorry about the confusion.
Logan: He is?
Rory: He wants to apologize to you himself.
Logan: Are you sure about this?
Rory: I double super swear on my Birken bag.
Logan: Ok, thats good. This cloak and dagger stuff can be a little tricky if you dont own a dagger...and you look funny in a cloak.
Rory: Im sure you look good in a cloak. So everythings cool?
Logan: Everythings cool.
Rory: Good....Logan?
Logan: Yeah?
Rory: I love you.
Logan: Wow... The lady who sold that purse to me said this was gonna happen.
Rory: [laughs] I'm sorry. I didn't mean to spring that on you, I just wanted to say it. So, I said it. But I don't expect anything. Believe me, I was in this position once, when somebody said it to me, completely out of the blue, and I was completely thrown. So don't worry, you don't have to respond immediately. I mean, in fact, you don't have to say anything at all.
Logan: Look, I've told a lot of girls I loved them before, and I didn't mean it, so, Im not going to do that to you. Boy, that didnt come out right, it was supposed to sound alot more...
Rory: Hey, you dont have to say anything.
[he reaches over and kisses her]

6.05 We've Got Magic To Do

Rory: Hello.
Logan: Oh, My God, who was that?!
Rory: My assistant. I forwarded my phone to hers.
Logan: You have an assistant?
Rory: Just for this DAR thing. I get a million calls.
Logan: Well, I consider myself lucky to be patched through.
Rory: You have priority clearance.
Logan: So, good news. I get the PA system you wanted, at the price you wanted.
Rory: Really? Oh, cool. [to Lacey] Lacey, PA system, done.
Lacey: Excellent.
Rory: Thats great.
Logan: This guy has done the sound at every party Ive ever thrown. He's the best in the business.
Rory: And oh, goody, Paris is here. And she looks upset.
Logan: That and a bulldozer, would knock me over.
Paris: Excuse me! The door is locked!
Lacey: Do you know her?
Rory: Let her in, and then hide. [to Logan] I'll call you later.
Logan: Bye.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Mitchum: Richard.
Richard: Oh, Mitchum old boy. I didnt know you were out there
Mitchum: Just got here. Its quite the affair, we got going here.
Richard: And for a wonderful cause.
Mitchum: Not stuffy like the others, no smell of moth balls.
Richard: You know, my granddaughters responsible for it.
Mitchum: Oh, yeah?
Richard: Planned the whole thing.
Mitchum: That nice. I didnt know that. She's a sweet kid.
Richard: The sweetest.
Mitchum: Yeah, I wish Rory nothing but the best. I came straight from work, without looking in a mirror. Wish I had.
Richard: Mitchum, just out of curiosity, what happened with all that?
Mitchum: All what?
Richard: At that paper of yours in Stanford. Something apparently got blown out of proportion, there was some misunderstanding.
Mitchum: Oh it was nothing much, she's a great kid.
Richard: She is. And a great journalist. Ive read things shes written, shes a talent.
Mitchum: Maybe.
Richard: What do you mean maybe?
Mitchum: Well, I worked with her, Richard. I read her stuff, too.
Richard: Meaning...
Mitchum: Ive read great. I know what great is.
Richard: Well, when I said great I didnt mean she was Ben Bradley yet, but she could be.
Mitchum: Anything's possible.
Richard: What exactly happened at that paper, Mitchum?
Mitchum: It didnt work out, Richard. It was just one of those things. She's better off for what I did.
Richard: And what exacly did you do?
Mitchum: Nothing you wouldnt have done.
Richard: Oh, and what was that?
Mitchum: You're in the business world, you have employees.
Richard: Yes, of course.
Mitchum: Say youve got a guy working in your office. You brought him in. Nice guy, everybody loves him, but he just doesnt have it. He's a drain on the company. What are you going to do?
Richard: My granddaughter was not a drain on your company.
Mitchum: My point is, that I wasnt going to put her in a position to become a drain. Now, Richard, really we should get back out there.
Richard: What did you say to her?
Mitchum: Richard.
Richard: What did you say to her, Mitchum?
Mitchum: I did what I do with everyone. I called it like I saw it. I was honest with her. I dont pussyfoot, you know that.
Richard: You crushed her.
Mitchum: And if she's got what it takes, she'll bounce back. No one's ever criticized you, Richard? Reprimanded you, critiqued you? I find that hard to believe
Richard: This is not about me.
Mitchum: She was in over her head, she lacked maturity.
Richard: She's not even 21!
Mitchum: Look! Just blame me, okay. I felt bad that she had to sit through that disastrous dinner with Shira and Pop, going on about marriage and how she cant become a Huntzberger. I dont care about any of that, so I gave her a shot. And she wasnt up to it.
Richard: You crushed that girl!
Mitchum: I did what I do. We should have done this on the phone.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Shira: Emily!
Emily: Hello, Shira. Im here to rescue you. Ive got a table for you and Mitchum right in the center.
Shira: Thank you, Emily, Im undeserving.
Emily: Nonsense. A mistake was made, and it must be rectified.
Shira: Arent they amazing?
Emily: The whole combo is amazing, follow me.
Shira: Me, I love the Beatles. Mitchum took me to see Paul McCartney last year, and I almost died.
Emily: So, Richard tells me we have a little problem.
Shira: Really? With what?
Emily: With the kids. Logan, Rory, I understand that you're not exactly thrilled with the match, that you let that be known to Rory at the dinner she had at your house.
Shira: Well, I wouldnt say not thrilled.
Emily: Then what would you say?
Shira: Oh, Emily, this is a party.
Emily: Im just curious
Shira: This may not be the time and place, Emily.
Emily: Lets make it the time and place.
Shira: Consider the discrepancies, Emily.
Emily: Well, thats whats confusing me. They both come from good families, they both have good values. Money's not an issue. We all have money.
Shira: Frankly, Emily, there's your money, then theres our money.
Emily: Oh?
Shira: And our family has alot responsibilities that come with that, an image to maintain.
Emily: Ah, yes. Well, let me tell you this, Shira. We are just as good as you are. You dont think Rory's good enough for your son? As if we dont know about Logan's reputation? We do. But he is welcome in our home anytime, and you should extend the same courtesy to Rory.
Shira: Emily...
Emily: Now, lets talk about your money. You were a two bit gold digger fresh off the bus from Hicksville, when you met Mitchum, in whatever bar you happened to stumble into. And what made Mitchum choose you to marry from among the pack of women he was bedding at the time, Ill never know. But hats off to you for bagging him. Hes still a playboy, you know. Well, of course you know. That would explain why your weight goes up and down 30 pounds every other month. But thats your cross to bear. These are ugly realities, no one needs to talk about them. These kids are staying together for as long as they like, you wont stop them. Now, enjoy the event.

6.04 Always a Godmother, Never a God

[Rory is giving a party for the DAR for Emily, she sees Logan and walks up to him]
Rory: Hey, I didnt know you were coming.
Logan: Yeah, I forgot you were having a thing...today.
Rory: Oh, thats okay, because now I get to show you off. Nancy, Lucy, Id like you to meet Logan Huntzberger. Logan, this is Nancy Osgood and Lucy Fatsenfield.
Lucy: How do you do, Logan. Its such a pleasure to meet the young Huntzberger.
Logan: Hey.
Rory: Um, Logan, I think Ive told you about Nancy. Shes the one who insists I look like Clara Barton, which Im still not sure is a compliment.
Nancy: Oh, its a compliment of the highest order.
Rory: Um, well, if you'll excuse us, I think I promised Logan one of the coveted salmon puffs.
Lucy: Its so nice to meet you, Logan.
[he nods, and follows Rory to the kitchen]
Rory: Want some coffee? [sees Logan pouring some scotch] With your scotch?
Logan: Sorry, I'm just not in the mood to deal with this type of thing right now, these type of people.
Rory: Why? Did something happen?
Logan: So, how long do you think this thing is going to last?
Rory: An hour, hour and a half tops, then fifteen minutes to pay the caterers, and make sure the cleaning staff knows what to do. Hey, I have an idea. Why dont you go hang out in the poolhouse, and then Ill come out as soon as I finish up here, and then we can talk?
Logan: [smiling] Yeah, okay.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

[Rory walks to the poolhouse, and hears loud noise coming from inside]
Finn: (on the phone) So cancel with him, darling, is that so difficult?...I find the fact that you love him completely irrelevant.
Rory: Whats going on?
Logan: Hey! Is that my salmon puff?
Rory: Yeah.
Logan: Anything is good that comes in a puff. Hi. [he kisses her]
Colin: Hey, Rory.
Rory: Hey, Colin. I didnt know you guys were coming over.
Logan: I invited them over, I hope thats cool.
Rory: Yeah, of course its cool, I just... I would have brought more puffs.
Logan: You need a drink.
Rory: No, I...
Finn: Quick, someone give me a sonnet, Melissa's a poetry major.
Colin: There once was a gal from Nantucket.
Finn: Stop it, Colin. Im not trying to propose. (into the phone) Melissa, you miss me, darling?
Rory: Uh, Logan?
Logan: Yeah, Ace?
Rory: who's the skirt?
Logan: Ah, that is Colin's milkmaid.
Rory: He brought her back from Holland?
Colin: Yes, he did.
Rory: (to the girl) Oh, hi! Im Rory. Ive heard a lot about you.
Colin: She doesnt understand English.
Rory: Oh, sorry.
Colin: Yes, arent we all.
Rory: Colin, rude.
Colin: Everywhere I go, everything I do, surprise, there she is.
Rory: Well you brought her here, what did you expect?
Colin: I dont know what happened. When we were in the Netherlands, she seemed so amazing, you know? But the minute we left, she began to lose her appeal.
Rory: Well, everything seems appealing when you're stumbling out of an Amsterdam Coffee Bar.
Finn: Tell me about it. One night, I spent half an hour hitting on a bike. (into the phone) Maria! You're the only one who can save me.
Colin: Rory, you've got to understand. Milkmaids are like, iconic over there. Theyre basically like Dutch Superheroes. Dating Katrika was liking dating Wonderwoman.
Rory: Katrika.
Logan: Yeah, he's gonna be hearing about that one for a long time.
Finn: (into the phone) Oh, I see, well, just so you know, I think you're an awfully sweet girl for dating a guy with such an unfortunate skin condition. (to Rory) Rory, any chance of you breaking up with Logan in the next twenty minutes?
Rory: Sorry.
Finn: (into the phone) Veronica, still engaged, darling?...Well I am too, but Im not going to say with what.
Rory: (to Logan) So, this is a suprise, the guys being here and everything.
Logan: Well, Colin just got back, and I hadnt seen him. Is that okay?
Rory: Oh, yeah, its fine. I just...well, you seemed like you were in a bad mood earlier.
Logan: Well, this is how you get out of a bad mood, Ace. Hey, lets get something to eat, Im starving.
Colin: Yes! Chinese food. No dairy in Chinese food.
Finn: Perfect, General Lee's has that adorable waitress with a very tiny intellect.
Logan: General Lee's?
Rory: General Lee's. Just give me a minute, and I'll go change.
Logan: No way, you have that hot librarian thing going on. Grab a book, and lets go.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

[Rory and Logan are in bed, her alarm rings]
Logan: Go back to sleep.
Rory: I have to go the baptism.
Logan: Blow it off.
Rory: I cant.
Logan: You can do anything. You just have to believe in yourself. Did you learn nothing from "Mad Hot Ballroom"?
Rory: I have to go to Stars Hollow...I have to see my mom.
Logan: One, two, cha cha cha.
Rory: (gets out of bed) Okay, nothing else to do, but to get up and face the music. (holds up two dresses) Which one looks better with a baby?

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

[Rory is driving in her car, when she calls Logan]
Logan: Hello?
Rory: Hey.
Logan: Hey. How was the baptism?
Rory: Fine. I dont know. I dont know whats going on. Im not handling things particularly well these days.
Logan: Yeah, I know what you mean.
Rory: Logan, are you okay?
Logan: I had a talk with my father the other day, and apparently Im going to graduate this year. Im going to get my act together, and Im going to become a Huntzberger.
Rory: What does that mean?
Logan: Im going to start attending share holder meetings, letting the boys see my face around, it means my pre-ordained life is kicking in.
Rory: Oh...Im sorry.
Logan: Hey, always read the fine print on the family crest.
Rory: Maybe you can talk to your dad, tell him how you feel.
Logan: Hey, how far away are you from the airport?
Rory: Why?
Logan: Lets go to New York.
Rory: What?
Logan: New York, you and me, right now, by helicopter.
Rory: By helicopter? You're kidding.
Logan: We'll spend the weekend at the Pierre, you dont have your community service again until Monday, right?
Rory: Yeah...but...
Logan: Don't pack, we'll shop, much more irresponsible that way.
Rory: Um...Logan.
Logan: See you in the airport in 20 minutes, Ace.
Rory: Okay. See you in 20 minutes.

6.03 The Ungraduate

[Senior citizens Home, Rory is giving dance lessons]

Rory: Oh, my God! Hey, Stranger.
Logan: And hello to you.
[they kiss]
Mr. Fink: Watch those hands, Miss Gilmore.
Rory: Touche, Mr. Fink [to Logan] What are you doing here?
Logan: Well, I was in Copenhaggen this morning, and then I remembered I have a four o'clock mambo class.
Rory: I'm so glad you're back. So, how was Europe?
Logan: Same as it was last year.
Rory: [sees he injured his finger] What did you do?
Logan: Long embarassing story. I'll tell you later.
Rory: Okay. Oh, wait, hold on. [to the class] Ok, everyone, it is time for cake and punch. [the class groans] It is only a 15 minute break, and then it is back to the dance floor.
Logan: So, you're Arthur Murray now?
Rory: No, I don't have that much training. The dance teacher has an inner ear infection, I'm just filling in. My job is to make sure no one falls down.
Logan: And what is someone does?
Rory: Thats what the panic button is for.
Logan: [laughs] So when does this crazy rock and roll party wrap up?
Rory: Another 45 minutes. But if you get yourself some cake and punch, it will only seem like 40. [he kisses her] I missed you.
Logan: That was my plan.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
[Logan is lying on the couch at the poolhouse, wearing a blanket, Rory
is handing him a glass, wearing his shirt]

Logan: Thank you.
Rory: You're welcome. [gets under the blanket] I missed this.
Logan: Me, too.
Rory: Oh, so you, Colin and Finn didnt do alot of cuddling in Europe?
Logan: Nah, just a lot of hand holding.
Rory: So, is there any official record of this trip, or was all evidence confiscated at the airport?
Logan: I got pictures.
Rory: Oh, yeah? Can I see?
Logan: Hand me that. Now, you realize, if I show you mine, you have to show me yours.
Rory: You saw mine about five minutes ago, Mister.
Logan: Ahh...I hate it when you work blue. Ok, here is Colin sleeping on the train. And here is Finn shoving carrot sticks up Colin's nose as Colin sleeps on the train.
Rory: Very mature
Logan: We try. This is Glouchester, England...
Rory: Pretty.
Logan: Where we attended the famous, Glouchester Cheese Rolling Fesival, a time honored tradition where five brave men, such as myself, climb to the top of a hill, with a large roll of cheese, and proceed to push it, then run after it as it rolls all the way down.
Rory: Shut up! Why would you commit that to film?
Logan: Thats me, thats Colin, thats Finn, and that is the cheese.
Rory: If you beat the cheese to the bottom of the hill, are you disqualified, or do you win?
Logan: There are no winners or losers in the Glouchester Cheese Rolling Festival.
Rory: There certainly aren't any winners.
Logan: [hold up his injured finger] Tell me about it.
Rory: Who's that?
Logan: Ah, now, that is the love of Colin's life.
Rory: Colin fell in love?
Logan: Yeah, he met her in Holland. And she doesn't speak a word of English, so she has no idea how incredibly annoying she finds him.
Rory: What's with the outfit?
Logan: She's a milkmaid.
Rory: Stop.
Logan: She has cows, she has pails.
Rory: Colin fell in love with a milkmaid?
Logan: It's pretty serious, too. He ditched us, and followed her to Amsterdam, where they've been holed up ever since. We haven't heard a word from him. I mean, we assume he'll be back by the time...
Rory: By the time...what? By the time the cows come home, what? By the time school starts?
Logan: [sighs]
Rory: What? What's the matter?
Logan: Nothing.
Rory: Logan, you can mention school to me.
Logan: I don't want to bum you out.
Rory: Logan. That is ridiculous. I am fine. I mean, look, Yale was a wonderful chapter in my life, but I've moved on. I have my work, I have my new pad. I just really like we're I am right now.
Logan: Really...
Rory: Logan, you dont have to feel weird about this. You go to Yale, your friends go to Yale. How can we not talk about Yale?
Logan: I don't know.
Rory: Exactly. So we both agree that the topic of Yale can never be off limits.
Logan: Ok, fine. Well, if your so cool with it, then why don't you come to Yale tomorrow, and I can show you my new apartment, and maybe take you out to lunch.
Rory: I can't tomorrow. Because I have my DAR induction luncheon.
Logan: Then how about breakfast?
Rory: Breakfast sounds good.
Logan: I have to say, Ace. I like the new digs.
Rory: Yeah, its nice, huh? You haven't even seen the bedroom yet.
Logan: Oh, wow. Ok, but dont think this is going to work a second time. [gets up, wrapping the blanket around him]
Rory: No, Logan...I didn't mean...I seriously meant that you haven't seen the bedroom yet.
Logan: You're making me feel cheap, Ace.
Rory: Logan! I swear, I wasn't working blue!

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Rory: So, I told the guy, hey, there is no way all these potatoes could have been peeled, if I had waltzed in here at 12. He simply refused to believe me, or credit me with the hours. So, finally I just said, you know what there is another soup kitchen down on Hadley, and they serve more vegetables than you do, so I would rather work there, anyhow. And, I turned in my apron, and I walked out.
Logan: Wow. Rough world, the world of community service.
Rory: Oh, you don't know the half of it. I've done 125 hours, so Ive got 175 to go, which is a little off my goal, but not by much, so I can deal. I've got that candy striper thing starting next week, I didn't really want that, but I had to take it. Because I was supposed to get on this Zoo beat, which would have been gross, but great, because they'll let you do double shifts, but they're always full. Weird, huh?
Logan: Very weird.
Rory: I'm boring you.
Logan: Far from it, I just have to go. I have to meet with my faculty advisor and convince her that this is the year I'm finally going to make something of myself.
Rory: Well, don't tell her about the cheese rolling incident, she'll never believe you.
Logan: Do you want a walk back to your car?
Rory: No, I think I can make it by myself
Logan: Ok, call you later?
Rory: Okay.

6.01 The New and Improved Lorelai

[Rory and Paris at the pool house...]
Paris: Rory?
Rory: In here
Paris: You live here?
Rory: Home sweet home.
Paris: Arent you worried that one night you're going to sleepwalk right into that pool and drown?
Rory: I am now.
Paris: [points at closet] The stuff's in here?
Rory: Go to town.
Paris: Im meeting more of Doyle's family tonight. Ive been meeting people for months. He's got like 500 cousins. And you know what? He's the tallest one in the family.
Rory: Really?
Paris: Yup. His family get togethers are like a Lollipop Guild convention. I have to stop myself from asking how its going at the Chocolate Factory.
Rory. Good. Good...get it all out now.
Paris: This isnt that bad.
Rory: Yeah, there's a belt in there that matches.
Paris: So, I have a matter to discuss with you. Doyle and I have decided to move into together.
Rory: Wow. Congratulations.
Paris: Thanks, we found this great duplex, lots of room, seperate bathrooms. And its a two bedroom. So, I was wondering if you would like to move in with his.
Rory: Very Bob and Carol, Ted and Alice. Minus Bob.
Paris: Now, its not until school starts, because its rented until then. But I thought it would be a perfect situation.
Rory: Its a very nice offer, Paris. But I cant. Im not going back to school.
Paris: You're pregnant.
Rory: No!
Paris: You're sick. You look pasty.
Rory: I am not sick.
Paris: Well, I know your National Guard unit didnt get called up, so whats the story?
Rory: Im just taking some time off.
Paris: No. You dont take time off.
Rory: Did you find what you need, because I have to finish getting ready.
Paris: What happened? Something must have happened?
Rory: Nothing happened. People take time off. Einsten took a year off.
Paris: Yeah, after he discovered three laws of physics.
Rory: Alright, I do not have to defend my life to you. Im a grown up, Im independent, Im on my own.
Paris: You have no furniture.
Rory: Well, Im redecorating. I want to individualize it, to my taste.
Paris: Oh. I get it. I know what this is about.
Rory: No, you dont.
Paris: Sure, I do.
Rory: Paris, just take what you need and go, okay?
[Logan walks in]
Logan: Hey, sorry Im late. [kisses Rory on the cheek]. Paris.
Paris: [to Logan, as she leaves] YOU!
Logan: [shrugs confused] I think vacation is coming at just the right time for her.
Rory: Im ready. Lets go.
Logan: [looks at the empty living room] Did you get robbed?

************************************************** *****

Rory: So, a drink, dinner and a movie? Thats really what we're doing tonight?
Logan: I dont understand, why wont you just believe me? Im tired, I just want a mellow evening with my girlfriend.
Rory: The last time you were mellow, you had a 104 fever, and even then we went bar hopping for an hour before your fainted.
Logan: Men dont faint, men pass out. Drink, dinner, movie. Thats it. [kisses her, and leads her to a door- Felon Party]
LDB: [sings]For she's a jolly good felon, for she's a jolly good felon, for she's a jolly good felon....which nobody can deny.
Logan: [kisses her] After the party, that is.

************************************************** *******

Finn: My best sloth year, was my sophomore year, I believe. I went to Spain for a week, to drown myself in Cervantes, wound up staying for two months, and almost joined the French Foreign Legion.
Rory: But you were in Spain.
Finn: Yes, but Sinatra didnt sing about the Spanish Foreign Legion.
Juliet: Could you pass me three peanuts?
Colin: Two months is nothing.
Finn: Oh, you think you can outdo me?
Colin: Freshman year, 4 1/2 month cross country road trip, this was pre-navigational assistance, people
Finn: In Junior year, I dumped my things in my dorm room, jumped on a plane to Australia, and surfed until Christmas.
Colin: You did not.
Finn: I did.
Colin: Where was I?
Finn: In class, like a good little boy.
Rosemary: Amazing. Their actually having a loseroff.
Colin: Oh, look how she mocks. And this from the girl who didnt come out of her room for a month all because of a tragic hair cut.
Rosemary: It was not a tragic hair cut. It was apocolyptic highlights. I looked like a Tim Burton character.
Juliet: Two more peanuts. Little ones.
Colin: Hey, Logan, do you remember that time you left class to make an entrance for that mock debate and you ended up in Atlantic City?
Logan: Vaguely.
Finn: Now, this man here, my darlings, is the long reigning king of the Sloths.
Colin: Thats right. No one can waste time like this man, here..
Rory: Really?
Logan: No.... Now who wants a drink?
Colin: Oh, he's just being modest. Logan has a talent for doing nothing that has yet to be matched by man...or...actual sloth.
Juliet: Ok, I feel a lip stick crisis coming on. I'll be right back
Rosemary: I'll go with you.
Rory: King of the Sloths, huh? I dont know, this year I may give you a run for your money.
Colin: Oh really?
Rory: Yes, all kings must be dethroned eventually. And this year, that crown will be mine.
Colin: All hail, Rory Gilmore, future Queen of the Sloths.
Finn: All Hail. Alright, time to make the rounds, see which one of these lovely lady is soused enough, to find my arrogance charming.
Rory: Finn, have you ever thought about just wooing a woman? A little chocolate, flowers, slow jam in the background?
Finn: Slow jam is for the subtle, Rory. One too many has a delightful immediacy. You coming, Colin?
Colin: Absolutely.
Rory: I wonder how beer tastes with ice cream in it.
Logan: I give you one month.
Rory: To do what?
Logan: Before you're back in school, one month.
Rory: You are wrong.
Logan: Nope.
Rory: Oh, I can not believe how little faith you have in me. I mean, what kind of match would I be for you, if I just went running right back to a life of respectability without even attempting to join the French Foreign Legion?
Logan: You love school.
Rory: Not anymore.
Logan: No. You love school. I saw it. That doesnt just go away.
Rory: Well, I have reformed. From now on, no more scheduling, no more planning. I am just going to spend my days making ice cream beer floats, and just taking life as it comes. You'll see. New me.
Logan: If you say so.
Rory: I do say so. [they kiss]
Rosemary: Oh, I love this song! You have got to come dance with us, so we can work the beer off, otherwise one of us will be going home with Finn.
Rory: Oh, this is for a good cause.
Logan: Take her.
Rory: Ok, Save my seat, and order me a scoop of vanilla.

Season 5 Round Up

5.13 WBB
5.14 SS
5.15 JaCF
5.16 SGT
5.17 PF
5.19 BIaG
5.20 HMKtCC
5.21 BtBaM
5.22 AHiNaH

5.22 A House is Not a Home

(phone rings)

Lorelai: Hello?
Logan: Uh...hi. Is Rory there?
Lorelai: She just left, who's calling?
Logan: Its Logan.
Lorelai: Oh. She's not here.
Logan: Ive been trying to get her. Her phone must be off, or dead, or something.
Lorelai: Well, she's heading back to school. You can just catch up with her there.
Logan: Yes, Ill do that.
Lorelai: Okay, bye.
Logan: Uh, listen...Im sorry to call you house. I just had this number, and I wanted to talk to Rory.
Lorelai: Its okay, Logan.
Logan: And, listen, I know you must be really upset by this whole thing, but I want you to know my father's lawyers are all on the situation.
Lorelai: Hey, you know what? I think your father's done just about enough here, okay.
Logan: Done enough?
Lorelai: Yes. So thank your father for this. And I do mean ALL of this. But I think I can handle it from here.
Logan: But...
Lorelai: His help isnt needed, Logan. Ive got it.
Logan: Okay, you've got it. Sorry...I was just
Lorelai: Rory should be back at school soon.
Logan: Right. Sorry to bother you.
Lorelai: No problem. Bye. (hangs up phone)

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

(Logan is sitting outside Rory's dorm when she walks up)
Rory: Hey.
Logan: What did he do?
Rory: What?
Logan: My father. WHat did he do?
Rory: Who told you that he did anything?
Logan: I called your house. I talked to your mom.
Rory: Great. (walks inside)
Logan: I should have known something happened the way you showed up at Honor's party like that. I should have known.
Rory: My mother shouldnt have said anything.
Logan: She didnt say any specifics.
Rory: Then what did she say?
Logan: Rory, just tell me what happened.
Rory: Its stupid, I feel stupid.
Logan: Rory...
Rory: I overreacted. You'll think Im three.
Logan: Tell me!
Rory: He just...doesnt think that Ive got what it takes to be a journalist. He says he knows when someone has it. And I apparently, do not have it.
Logan: He said that to you?
Rory: Yeah.
Logan: Just like that?
Rory: Pretty much.
Logan: (angry) I knew it. I knew this was going to happen. I didnt want you to take that internship.
Rory: I had to take the internship. Your father is the top guy in the business.
Logan: My father is a jackass. He's a bully. He has zero interest in people's feelings. Its always just say what you want, right or wrong, who the hell cares who you hurt. Whatever. Im going over there right now.
Rory: Logan, no.
Logan: You're my girlfriend, Rory. He should have treated you better than that.
Rory: I dont want you to say anything.
Logan: I have to.
Rory: Logan, no...please. I just want to forget this. I just want it to go away. And please dont make a big thing between you and your Dad. I dont want that.
Logan: Rory...
Rory: Dont put me in that position, please.
Logan: (sighs) Im sure he'll get me a crappy present for my birthday. Maybe I can pick a fight with him over that.
Rory: Thank you.
Logan: You should have told me.
Rory: I didnt want to tell you.
Logan: Hey, if this relationship thing is going to work, then it goes both ways. You have to tell me why we're committing a felony before we do it. Not that it will stop us, but at least we'll have all the facts, okay?
Rory: Okay. Im sorry.
Logan: Come here. (hugs her, and kisses her forehead) Do you need some help packing?
Rory: No. Ive got my last final today. I should go over my notes.
Logan: Okay, call me after.
Rory: I will.
Logan: You good?
Rory: Im good.
Logan: OKay. Oh. And try to talk to your mother. My father's lawyers should really handle this thing. They've had a lot of practice, believe me.
Rory: (smiles) Okay. I'll talk to her.

5.21 Blame Booze and Melville

(Rory is walking past the elevator at the paper)
Logan: (smiling) Hey, Ace.
Rory: Hey! You're early.
Logan: There's a first for everything. Where's the fire?
Rory: Oh, just south of the 95, its four alarm. We've got Kessler on it. (to receptionist) this is from Patel.
Receptionist: Im not talking to him.
Rory: I'll tell him. (to Logan) How did you know about the fire?
Logan: (smiling) I didnt. I meant where are you going in such a hurry.
Rory: Oh, Im in half speed compared to this morning. (groans) Oh, no.
Logan: What?
Rory: Im gone for five minutes, and this place becomes a dumping ground.
Logan: Im loving the totally non-generic feel of your space here.
Rory: I have customized it somewhat.
Logan: Eccentrice uncle?
Rory: Brian Eno.
Logan: I was close. So, lets go.
Rory: Its 4:30.
Logan: So cut out early, there's nothing going on.
Rory: We're doing our last front page, we're picking our leads, our photos, its the busiest part of the day.
Logan: So if the people of Stanford dont get their paper tomorrow, they'll turn on the radio.
Rory: I cant go.
Logan: I know the boss.
Rory: So do I.
Logan: But I know how to work the boss, at least a little. I know he's somewhere in the vicinty.
Rory: Who? Your dad?
Logan: Cant you sense it? The flurry, the fight, and the shuffle of sychophants
(Mitchum walks up)
MItchum: Hey. Someone new. Have we been introduced?
Logan: Jose Canseco, post steroids. Should be a warning to people.
Mitchum: Are you keeping Rory from her work?
Rory: I was just about to call security.
Mitchum: Does everyone know about the...
Rory: Meeting on Friday, main conference room, come with your game.
Mitchum: Good. (to Logan) Did you call your mother about the Vineyard?
Logan: She's on my list.
Mitchum: (to Rory) Push him on that, wont you? Im going to 4 if you want to catch up. See ya.
Rory: Okay.
Logan: Enjoy four. (to Rory) Whats four?
Rory: Fourth floor.
Logan: You news people and your jargon.
Rory: We have our own language.
Logan: He been treating you alright?
Rory: Who, your dad? He's been great.
Logan: You sure?
Rory: Yeah
Logan: Just checking. So what do you think about Friday?
Rory: An excellent alternative to Thrusday.
Logan: My sister's engagement party.
Rory: Oh, right. Im gonna try. Im dying to see the yacht.
Logan: Well, it will be full of Honor's ditzy friends, but the harbor's cool. Try and leave your grandparents dinner early. They get you every friday night, let me get one.
Rory: You're very one note today
Logan: Well, I miss you, Ace
Rory: Well, I'll have more free time once finals are over, and summer's here, unless I get that summer job here.
Logan: Well, you're probably a shue in. My father seems to like you.
Rory: Oh, I hope so. I love it here.
Logan: Okay, so I'll just hang somewhere till you're done?
Rory: Absolutely. I'll be done 6:30, 7 at the latest.
Logan: Ace...
Rory: 6:45.
(they kiss)
Logan: So maybe I'll go hang out on 2 or 5. Is that the right terminology?
Rory: You're getting there.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Rory: That was fun
Mitchum: Yeah. Thats how those things should go, give and take. The less I say, the better.
Rory: Can I get you anything?
Mitchum: No. Im about to take off here.
Rory: Okay.
Mitchum: So, Im going to be pulling back soon.
Rory: From the paper?
Mitchum: Ive done my damage. Its time for them to take it, and make something of it.
Rory: Oh, okay.
MItchum: I'll probably be in Monday, maybe Tuesday, and not so much after that.
Rory: Well, Im happy to keep going, even without you here.
Mitchum: You know, you and I havent really sat down and talked about the situation, about how you're doing here, and all.
Rory: You've been busy.
Mitchum: I meant to, I offered you the job, took you under my wing, its part of the deal.
Rory: Great! I would love your feedback.
Mitchum: Go on and sit. (takes a deep breath) Ive worked with alot of young people over the years, interns, new hires, Ive got a pretty good gut sense for peoples strengths and weaknesses, whether they have that certain something to make it in journalism. Its a tough businnes. A lot of stress.
Rory: Definitely.
Mitchum: And Ive got to tell you, you dont got it. Now guts can be wrong, mine's been wrong before. But not often.
Rory: I thought I was doing okay.
Mitchum: I just dont think you really have the drive to put yourself out there, to be honest. To get a story, to dig. I mean, just now in this meeting, I encouraged everyone to say whatever they wanted, you said nothing.
Rory: I wasnt sure if I should!
Mitchum: Exactly. I mean, you saw Harry. He jumped right into the fire. You didnt.
Rory: But Harry's not an intern!
Mitchum: Doesnt matter.
Rory: Ive always done whats asked of me.
Mitchum: You see the thing is, in the real world, its not always good enough to do just whats asked of you.
Rory: But I thought I was in a really good rythym with everyone here.
Mitchum: Im not saying your not competent. You're smart, you're terrific at anticipating needs, actually, you'd make a great assistant.
Rory: Oh.
Mitchum: Im sorry. Its not my pleasure to dissapoint someone like you. Especially you...well...with the extenuating circumstances. But its healthy. I dont BS.
Rory: I should get back.
Mitchum: Hey, listen. I know this is rough, but I may have just done you a big favor.
Rory: Oh. Well, thanks.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

(Rory walks up, Logan is talking to a pretty blonde)
Logan: Hey! You're here early.
Rory: I guess.
Logan: Way early. Did you skip your dinner?
Rory: Come down here, so we dont have to yell.
(Logan comes down)
Logan: So, there she is.
Rory: Who?
Logan: The boat. Calling her a she is one of those fun nautical traditions.
Rory: Right, something sexist in that, Im sure.
Logan: Im sure. (he kisses her) So, how did you get away?
Rory: I dont know, I just..got away.
Logan: Im glad.
Rory: So who is she?
Logan: Who?
Rory: The girl on the boat.
Logan: Okay, Im sorry. We were just calling the boat a she, Im a little bit behind on catching up. She's a friend of my sister's.
Rory: Well, I didnt mean to interrupt anything.
Logan: You werent interrupting anything.
Rory: It looked like I was.
Logan: Ive known her forever.
Rory: Well, i didnt mean to pull you away.
Logan: We were just talking. Me, her and her husband. If you want, I can have them pull out pictures of their two year old. Ben has them in his jacket pocket.
Rory: Do you even want me here?
Logan: Ace, I invited you here.
Rory: Right, on Friday night when you knew i couldnt come.
Logan: Its my sisters party. I didnt pick the night.
ROry: Traffic sucked getting here.
Logan: Sorry, but I cant do anything about the traffic either (notices people looking at them) Can we just, um...(leads her away from the yacht) What the hell is wrong with you?
Rory: Nothing, Im just in a weird mood.
Logan: I'll say.
Rory: Im sorry. I just...can we just go somewhere else?
LOgan: What?
Rory: Let's go somewhere else? I dont really feel like being around people.
Logan: Okay, name it.
Rory: Will your sister mind?
Logan: Ive been here an hour and a half, Ive talked to everybody, and my duty is done. Where do you want to go?
Rory: I dont know somewhere...far...out there.
Logan: Where?
Rory: Out to sea.
Logan: Out to sea?
Rory: Yeah. Lets take that fancy pants yacht of yours out for a spin.
Logan: Kind of tricky since its about to head out with all my sister's friends on it.
Rory: Oh. Well, dont you have another one?
Logan: Not here.
Rory: Well, where's the other one?
Logan: Far away. Lets just drive somewhere. Lets go to New York.
Rory: I dont want to drive, I want to be out there, just the two of us, alone.
Logan: Well...
Rory: You know the beginning of Moby Dick, how the narrator says,"when he finds himself growing grim about the mouth, and wanting to knock people's hats off, he takes to the sea"?
Logan: Yeah
Rory: Well, I feel like knocking people's hats off.
Logan: So, I guess we gotta take to the sea.
Rory: That one looks good.
Logan: Yeah
Rory: Nice and seaworthy.
Logan: Not ours to take.
ROry: That ever stopped you before?
Logan: I think Ive been a bad influence on you, Ace.
Rory: Lets go, Huntzberger.
Logan: Lets go.

5.20 How Many Kropogs to Cape Cod?

(Knock at the door)
Rory: Oh, shoot! What time is it?
Paris: Its hammer time.
Rory: Its Logan. Hairbrush is down.
Paris; You got it.
Logan: Evening, Ace.
Rory: Hi.(They kiss)
Paris: Nice. Very nice.
Rory: Hey, do you want to see my room? Its far away from here.
Logan: Super idea.
(they walk to Rory’s room, and kiss again)
Rory: Hello.
Logan: Hello
Rory: What are you thinking about?
Logan: Whether or not you’ve ever woken up with Paris standing over you with a knife.
Rory: Not recently. She’s been in a good mood.
Logan: Whys that?
Rory: Because she’s in love.
Logan: With Doyle?
Rory: Yes, with Doyle. And do not mock or make fun. Because when Paris is happy, the whole world is happy. But when she’s not happy, the whole world is Deadwood.
Logan: Got it. Are you hungry?
Rory: Yes, Im starving. Just let me get my sweater. (Opens her closet) Hey, what do you think of this dress? Does it look newspaper-y enough?
Logan: What?
Rory: Im trying to figure out what to wear to my first day on the paper.
Logan: Ah...the internship rears its ugly head again.
Rory: I want to look professional, but not too Lois Lane-y. And I don’t want to look like a college kid.
Logan: You are a college kid.
Rory: Not on Monday. On Monday, I am a newspaper woman. And I have to look like a newspaper woman.
Logan: Whatever you wear will be fine.
Rory: Im so excited.
Logan: I can tell.
Rory: Last night, I couldn’t sleep, so I googled your father.
Logan: Excuse me?
Rory: 12, 053 items came up. I could only pull up a couple thousand, but it really helped. He was born in 1953, Episcopalian, second of four children, oldest boy, Yale undergrad, star of the track team, no grad school. Interesting. Then he had a couple of lost years, kind of a blank period. A little Jesus thing going on there. Worked as a reporter and editor for two of the Huntzberger papers, before taking over as CEO of the company.
Logan: Uh...
Rory: I mean, when you look at all his accomplishments, the man must never sleep.
Logan: Well...
Rory: Oh! Hmm....hmmm....four hours a night, just like Clinton.
Logan: You don’t have a wall in a secret room with pictures of my father pasted all over it do you?
Rory: Logan, Im going to intern for him. I need to know everything about him. Is he an egghead? Because he seems very roll up the sleeves-y. But he’s written about everything from foreign affairs, domestic policy. He had a wine column, for Goddsakes. I should learn more about wine.
Logan: Look, Rory...
Rory: What are his politics? He’s unbelievably neutral in his writing. Right wing? Left wing? Middle wing? Oh! The man was short listed for the Pulitzer for covering the Iran Contra Scandal when he was 25.
Logan: Yeah, I heard something about that.
Rory: 25. How did he do that? Especially considering his lost years. He’s a born journalist. I mean what does he read? What papers? What journals? Come on, tell me something.
Logan: He hates peas.
Rory: Logan, I need your help here.
Logan: Rory, my dad and I basically have two conversations. ‘Logan, you’re not living up to your potential’ and ‘Logan, when you’re sailing close hold, wait until you’ve gained that last bit of speed before you pull in the jib sheet’. That’s it.
Rory: But...
Logan: Ace, you’ve learned more about my father in one day, then I’ve learned in my whole life. Don’t worry you’re going to be fine. Now, I thought we’d established that we’re both starving.
Rory: Yes, we have lets go. Oh, wait. Your dad covered Haiti in 1985. Must learn more about Haiti. Got it, okay. Lets go. (Walks towards the door) Hey, have you ever discussed, Pinochet with him, because one time he wrote...
Logan: Peas, Ace. Peas.
Rory: Sorry. Got it.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Logan: Hello?
Rory: Listen, you’re going to be getting a note from the Gilmore’s sometime soon. Maybe in the mail, maybe hand delivered tonight. For all I know, a carrier pigeon is headed for your room as we speak, you might want to open your window.
Logan: Why is a carrier pigeon heading here?
Rory: They want to have you over for dinner.
Logan: Oh....
Rory: They’re flipping out about it. She’s sending an apology for being so remiss as to wait one whole week since I had dinner at your house to extend an invitation. I mean, they’re losing it. So, Im calling to warn you, and I want you know that I didn’t suggest u shaving dinner with them, or encourage it in any way. And I definitely didn’t refer to you as my B-word in front of them, or even imply it, in any way, because you know, Im really happy with the way things have been going, and I dont want any pressure put on us. And Im sorry, and I think I already said that and thats it.
Logan: What are the odds of getting out of this?
Rory: Pretty much zero.
Logan: Then, lets do it.
Rory: Really?
Logan: Yeah, it wont be so bad.
Rory: Well, you are a true gentleman. (She hears a loud bang) Oh, my God! What was that?
Logan: Carrier pigeon. Poor thing, I should have opened the window.
Rory: Not funny.
Logan: Kinda funny.
Rory: Bye.
Logan: Bye.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Logan: Hello?
Rory: Help, help, help!
Logan: Whats the matter, Ace?
Rory: Nothing, I’ve just won the spaz of the year award. I believe it will be on the front page of the Gazette tomorrow.
Logan: Im sure its not that bad.
Rory: I don’t know what Im supposed to do, I don’t know where anybody is, I cant walk in these shoes, I got a run in my panty hose...I ran into a file cabinet.
Logan: Slow down.
Rory: I didn’t even know if I was supposed to go to lunch when everybody went to lunch, so I just stood in the break room for, like, 45 minutes, and then I ate an Altoid.
Logan: It’s the first day. It will get better.
Rory: Your father must think Im an idiot.
Logan: Im sure he doesn’t.
Rory: I need some help. I need something to say to him other than, “yes, the bleeding stopped, thanks.”
Logan: Hey, I think that’s pretty good.
Rory: Logan, please. Give me something. Something I can use to connect with him.
Logan: I don’t know.
Rory: You do know. This is important to me, Logan, please.
Logan: (sighs) He likes jazz, but not when it gets too experimental, and hates when you quote my ‘Favorite Things’.
Rory: What?
Logan: My favorite things...from the Sounds of Music.
Rory: Ok, good...go on.
Logan: Uh, he lets people go at 7, but he keeps going until 8:30 or 9, and he notices the people who stay. He hates double talk, but he’s really good at it. And he has high blood pressure, so he switches to decaf after 4.
Rory: That’s good. That’s almost something.
Logan: Don’t worry, Ace. Im sure you’re doing fine.
Rory: I just don’t want your father to be disappointed in me.
Logan: Rory, in order for my dad to be truly disappointed in you, your name would have to be Logan.
Rory: Im sure thats not true.
Logan: Uh huh.
Rory: Thanks, Logan.
Logan: Go get ‘em, Ace.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

(Logan goes to help Rory out of the car)
Rory: You know you’re not obligated to be polite until we’re actually inside my grandparents house.
Logan: Good. Allow me to use this moment in time, to make some disgusting sounds with my armpits.
Rory: Oh, would you? So, this is going to be quick and painless. Believe me, my grandparents like you better than they liked Ronald Reagan.
Logan: Wow. High Praise.
Rory: What are those?
Logan: Hostess gifts. Never a bad idea to bring hostess gifts.
Rory: Well played, Huntzberger.
Logan: So, what about your Mom? She going to be cool?
Rory: Of course she’ll be cool, she’s the essence of cool. Cool is her street name. She’s got it monogrammed on her towels, and everything.
Logan: Well, if she’s got it monogrammed on her towels, there’s nothing to worry about.
Rory: What did you bring, anyway?
Logan: Cigars for Richard, chocolates for Emily, and Mrs Eleanor Schubicks silver lighter.
Rory: Huh? Whats that for?
(Emily opens the door)
Emily: Rory...Logan...welcome.
Richard: Come in, come in.
Rory: Hi, Grandma.
Emily: Hello. And our guest of honor.
Richard: L’Innvite de honoeur
Logan: How are you, Richard...Emily?
Emily: Wonderful, now.
Richard: Yes, wonderful.
Emily: Oh, look at you two, you’re so perfect, arent they, Richard?
Richard: Perfect.
Rory: We’re not perfect
Emily: Nonsense, you’re perfect.
Logan: No, she’s right, I’ve got split ends like you wouldnt believe.
Richard: And a sense of humor.
Logan: Emily, these are for you, small token of my gratitude.
Emily: Wunderschon chocolates, I absolutely adore these.
Logan: I picked them up the last time I was in Switzerland.
Emily: Well, aren’t you clever?
Logan: And here’s a little something for you, Sir.
Richard: Oh, Romeo y Julietes. You are a good man, Logan Huntzberger.
Emily: Come, lets all go in the living room, shall we? I just adore this jacket you are wearing. Isn’t this a fine jacket, Richard?
Richard: Oh, I like how the lapels are cut. Aren’t these fine lapels, Rory?
Rory: Uh, sure Grandpa, his lapels look great.
Richard: Now, most modern tailors cut lapels too low. Its so sloppy having one’s lapels hang down around the chest like a basset hound’s ears, or something.
Emily: But those are excellent.
Richard: You know, they really are.
Rory: Hi, Mom.
Lorelai: Hey, how am I sitting?
Rory: Great. Um...mom you remember....
Emily: Logan, this is Rory’s mother, Lorelai. Lorelai, this is Logan Huntzberger.
Lorelai: Yes, we’ve met, actually. Nice to see you again, Logan.
Logan: Nice to see you.
Emily: Come on, sit, sit, sit. Lets get drink orders. Logan, what would you like?
Logan: McKellan neat, if you have it.
Emily: Oh, I adore a man who drinks his scotch neat.
Richard: That is a fine drink indeed.
Emily: Rory?
Rory: Just club soda.
Emily: So demure. Isn’t she demure?
Logan: The demurest.
Richard: One club soda.
Emily: And your usual, Lorelai? A side car?
Lorelai: A side car? No.
Emily: Isnt that your drink?
Lorelai: No, my drink is a martini, its always been a martini.
Emily: Really?
Lorelai: Yes. Pretty much every one of the other 8000 times I’ve had a drink here, its been a martini.
Emily: I would have sworn you were a side car girl.
Lorelai: Not even sure what’s in a side car, Mom.
Emily: Well, Richard, apparently, Lorelai would like a martini.
Richard: Can do.
Emily: I just cant get over those lapels.
Rory: Grandma and Grandpa are very taken with Logan’s lapels.
Lorelai: They look fine to me.
Emily: You’ll have to excuse Lorelai, Logan. It takes a certain eye to be aware of this kind of thing.
Richard: Here’s one Scotch neat, and a club soda.
Logan: Thank you.
Rory: Thanks, Grandpa.
Richard: And one, martini.
Emily: That with a twist, Lorelai?
Lorelai: Nope, an olive.
Emily: In a vodka martini?
Lorelai: Not vodka, Mom, gin. Its always been gin. Gin Martini.
Emily: Really?
Lorelai: Yes, always.
Emily: I don’t remember that at all.
Lorelai: Uh, so, Logan. Where do you live at Yale? Are you in Rory’s building?
Logan: No, Im at Berkley.
Lorelai: Is that far from Rory?
Logan: No, Id say its about 90 kropogs or so.
Richard: Huh! kropogs? Did someone say kropogs?
Emily: Kropog. Now, that is clever.
Lorelai: Fill me in here, what’s a kropog?
Logan: Years ago, people at Yale starting measuring things based on the height of a kid named Kropog
Richard: I cant believe today’s Elis are still saying kropog. Now, that is really something. Maxwell T. Kropog was his name. Class of ‘44. Oh, Lorelai. Im sorry, I forgot your drink. I made it, and everything.
Lorelai: Ah...well. You remembered now.
Emily: No, Richard, stay. I’ll get it.
Richard: Im glad to hear that kropog is still part of the Yale vernacular. Tradition is so important.
Rory: Why don’t we talk about something other than Yale?
Emily: Nonsense. There’s nothing better to talk about than Yale, because Yale men are the greatest. I dated a few Princeton men and a Harvard man back in my day, and they had nothing on Yale men.
Richard: They better not.
Emily: Here you go, Lorelai
Lorelai: Mom, there’s an onion in here.
Emily: Is that not what you wanted?
Lorelai: Olive. I said olive.
Emily: Well, I heard onion.
Lorelai: I said olive.
Emily: Let me get you an olive.


Emily: And the rackets have changed too. Honestly, the people at the club must have thought I showed up to play Badmitton when I showed up with my old wooden thing.
Logan: Ah, you have to get a new racket, Emily. The materials available today make all the difference.
Richard: I told her the same thing.
Logan: I know this guy. One of the top manufacturers in ceramic rackets. Pete Sampras loves him. I could totally set you up.
Emily: Did you hear that, Richard? Logan can set me up.
Richard: Now, how about that?
Beatrice: Dinner is ready, Mrs. Gilmore.
Richard: Well shall we?.
Emily: Im just going to pop in the kitchen and check on a thing or two. Richard, would you come and carve the roast?
Lorelai: Will there be any alcohol at dinner, Mom?
Emily: Excuse me?
Lorelai: You know, booze. Because I havent been able to get even a kropog of gin since that first drink.
Richard: A kropog is used to measure distance, Lorelai. Not volume.
Emily: And there will be wine with the meal. There’s always wine with the meal, Lorelai. Honestly, you're acting as if you’ve never been here.
Lorelai: Sorry. Just wasn’t sure.
Logan: Roast sounds good.
Rory: It does.
Lorelai: Yeah, who doesn’t like a good roast?
(they head to the dining room, Logan stops and takes Rory's arm)
Rory: What are you doing?
Logan: A little life and death brigade business. Every time we’re in a rich person’s house, I take a knick knack. Then I leave the knick knack I took from the last rich person’s house. I’ve been doing this up and down the eastern seaboard for years.
Rory: Logan, no.
Logan: Trust me, they never notice.
Rory: You’re crazy.
Logan: Its fun to be crazy.
(They go into the dining room)
Rory: Grandma will want us to sit here.
Emily: Alright, the salads will be out in just a moment. Everybody sit. Wait a minute.
Richard: What’s wrong, Emily?
Emily: Well, I don’t know. Wait. My antique sewing box. Its missing.
Richard: Well, that cant be.
Emily: It is. Its gone. Was it here during drinks?
Richard: I cant say that I noticed.
Emily: You, hovering there, what do you have to say about this?
Beatrice: Ma’am
Emily: My antique sewing box. Did you move it somewhere?
Beatrice: No.
Emily: And yet its not here. Do you have any explanation as to why its not here, Beatrice.
Lorelai: (from the dining room) Im sure its just a mix up, Mom.
Emily: And...whats this? Whats this lighter? Richard, is this from the pool house?
Richard: Well, I don’t recognize it. But, well, you never know. One of the guys might have left it after a poker game.
Emily: Well, Beatrice...I don’t know what to say. I almost feel like I should go through the whole house to make sure nothing else has been misplaced.
Lorelai: Mom, I found it.
Emily: However, we have company, and I don’t want to be rude, so lets leave it for later. And you and I will have a very serious discussion.
Lorelai: (holds her hand out to Logan, he gives her the box) Mom, I found it!
Emily: What?
Lorelai: Yeah, here it is.
Emily: Really? Where was it?
Lorelai: Behind the centerpiece, I guess the flowers kind of hid it.
Emily: Behind the centerpiece? (To Beatrice) what are you smiling about?
Beatrice: Im just glad you found it.
Emily: Would you please go into the kitchen and bring out the salad course. Rory, Logan, Im so sorry.
Richard: Well, never a dull moment, as they say.
Emily: Ah, here we go. Avocado salad with beet dressing.
Richard: Oh, wonderful. Im starving.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~


Logan: Believe me, Rory is the real star at the Yale Daily News. People hate her.
Emily: They hate you?
Rory: Im not hated. Am I hated?
Logan: Shes had more pieces printed above the fold this year, than anyone.
Richard: Well, you are both enormously talented. Because if you have one tenth of your father’s ability, young man. You will go straight to the top.
Emily: A power couple. Thats what you are.
Richard: We were thrilled to hear that Rory is going to be working with your father, Logan.
Rory: Im not really working with him, just near him, more like.
Logan: Shes knocking them dead over there. Now if I could just get her to relax.
Rory: I relax.
Emily: Speaking of relaxation, does your family still have their place on Martha’s Vineyard?
Logan: I think they bought it from Martha. They’re not giving that up. Its not going anywhere.
Emily: Its lovely in the Vineyard. A few years ago, Richard and I attended a wedding there. I thought there could be no more gorgeous a spot for a wedding.
Logan: Its beautiful.
Emily: But then we went to one on Cape Cod. And it was wonderful, too. Either place would be a good for a wedding, don’t you think?
Logan: Sure, I’ve been to weddings at the Cape myself.
Emily: So, you like Cape Cod?
Logan: Yes.
Emily: We like Cape Cod.
Logan: Great.
Emily: And I know Rory would love Cape Cod.
Rory: I like what I’ve seen in pictures.
Emily: You two would look awfully cute in Cape Cod.
Lorelai: Mom, did you get a job at the Cape Cod Chamber of Commerce?
Emily: No. (To Logan) There are a lot of kids in your family, arent there?
Logan: Yeah, the extended family’s been pretty busy procreating lately.
Richard: They have, have they?
Emily: Do you like kids?
Logan: Sure.
Emily: Kids love Cape Cod.
Lorelai: I think internships are a Communist plot.
Richard: What?
Lorelai: Forcing someone to work without pay? It’s a little pinko, isnt it? I mean, where’s Roy Cohn when you need him?
Emily: Have you lost your mind?
Lorelai: Nope...nope...still sloshing around up there.
Emily: Would you like another apple, Rory?
Rory: Oh, no thank you. They were really good, though.
Emily: How about you, Logan? Apple?
Logan: Thank you, but I don’t think I can eat another thing. And unfortunately, we should probably get going. I have an early day tomorrow.
Emily: An early day? Oh, Logan. Im so sorry we kept you.
Logan: I wish we could stay longer.
Emily: An early day is an early day. Beatrice, get their coats.
Logan: I had a wonderful time, thank you so much.
Rory: Yes, thank you, Grandma and Grandpa, it was great.
Emily: Of course. We had a wonderful time, too.
Rory: Bye, Mom.
Lorelai: Bye, hon. Good night, Logan.
Logan: Nice to see you, again.
Lorelai: Nice seeing you again, too. I hope we can all...
Emily: Lorelai, don’t keep them, Logan has an early day tomorrow.
Lorelai: Sorry.
Emily: Now, Im going to hold you to your promise about that tennis raquet.
Logan: Oh, absolutely. I’ll call you this week, or maybe I’ll just shoot you an email.
Emily: Shoot me an email, that is so clever.
Richard: That’s good business sense, too. You have to utilize the latest technology, or you’ll fall behind.
Emily: Now would you look at that. What a stunning little car. I adore sports coupes.
Richard: Fine parking job, too.
Rory: Well, Good-bye, Grandma and Grandpa.
Logan: Thanks again.
Emily: Good-night you two. Drive safe.